Stella was so shy Dante wasn't entirely sure she'd say yes when he asked her out, but her sparkling eyes made him very glad he did. He took her to the Wasteland Lounge, which was nicer than it sounded now that they'd put in a restaurant counter and added a few fancy features. Music blared from the new DJ patio upstairs.
It was a beautiful night. He parked the car and went to open her door, as nervous as if this was his first date ever. She looked beautiful, as always, in a cute black dress with pink polka dots. He took her hand.
"Thank you for coming out with me tonight."
"Thank you for asking me," she said.
"It's a beautiful night," he said. "Want to dance?"
He twirled her around the sand under the stars until they both were breathless. "I'm starving," he said. "Let's get a table."
Over dinner they found it easier to converse. After all, they lived in the same house on campus and had meals together all the time. And it only seemed natural for him to reach across the table and cover her hand with his.
She smiled, and blushed. He smiled back. He was shy, too. He knew exactly how it felt. But he wasn't too shy to leave his hand where it was.
"I ... like you so much, Dante," Stella said.
"I like you too," he said. He more than liked her, but he didn't want to be pushy. "I'm glad you feel the same. A lot of the girls back home think I'm boring."
Her eyes grew wide. "How could they possibly think that?"
He shrugged. "I'm always polite, I never lose my temper, I don't smash things or get in trouble. That equals boring."
"Those girls sound stupid," she said, with more pepper than he'd seen her show before. "I'm so sick of guys who act like total jerks. I've been waiting for someone kind and sweet like you my whole life."
Now it was Dante's turn to blush, but he got over it quickly. Standing up, he held out his hand, grinning at her mischievously.
"What?"
He pulled her to him and kissed her like he'd wanted to kiss her since the first time they met. "I've been waiting for you, too, Stella," he said. He tugged at her hand and led her outside to their own private dance floor under the stars. All the other kids were jam packed on the upstairs patio, but they had the backyard to themselves.
He held her close and they danced the night away.
Thursday, January 31, 2008
Dynamite Girl
"Hi, Jack." She was standing in front of his house when he got home from the store.
"Has it been five years already?"
"Close enough," Lucy said.
"You cut your hair."
"Yeah." She fluffed it with her hands.
"Suits you."
"Thanks. You going to invite me in?"
"Not sure I should."
"Suit yourself." Something hard came into Lucy's eyes and her expression shut down. She started to walk away but he stopped her.
"I know I'm going to regret this," he said, and kissed her.
Wow. Fireworks. Explosions in his head. Jack held Lucy at arm's length like she was a piece of live dynamite. He liked her way too much for his own good.
She bit her lip. "Can we please go inside? I ... really could use someone to talk to."
"OK," he said, surprised. Lucy didn't seem the type to open up about what she wanted for dinner, let alone her feelings.
They sat down on the couch.
"Jack, I'm a horrible person," she said. "I've got another boy in love with me and I know I'm going to end up breaking his heart."
Jack's heart sank. "So you decided to kiss me?"
"Here's the thing, Jack," she said, taking a deep breath. "You already know I'm a bad person, and you seem to like me anyway. That matters to me, that you like me the way I am."
"So I'm your lucky whipping boy, is that it?"
She looked stricken. "I didn't mean it like that. I really like George, you see, but his head's stuck in the clouds. He thinks I'm some kind of goddess or something. How can I possibly live up to that?"
"You could try, Lucy. People do change."
She waved an impatient hand. "Yeah, yeah. I could become all sweet and trusting and get my heart stomped on. Sounds like a million laughs."
"It's called being in love, Sweetheart."
"Whatever." She stared at her fingernails. "I don't know how to say this."
"You're doing a stellar job so far," he said, a little bitterly.
"Have I been too honest?" She looked at him with wide eyes.
"A little, yeah."
"OK, try this on for size. Kiss me, you idiot, I'm yours."
"I knew I was going to regret this," he said, but he kissed her anyway. The kiss started on the couch and traveled through the living room and then they were in bed and it was amazing. He didn't for a minute believe she meant anything she'd said but who cared.
Jack had learned that life was short. You had to grab your happiness when you could.
Let tomorrow take care of itself.
Dante Meets Stella
"So, Xanthe's nephew," Aries said. "Outta sight. Welcome to our humble abode."
"Nice place," Dante said, looking around with approval.
"It grows on one," Aries said. "Hey, I'll show you your room. This is Walter, though I suppose you two have met."
"Hey, Dante," Walter said, "I've gotta go to class, but let's hang later, OK?"
Dante smiled. "Cool."
"And Stella. Stella, say hi to the man."
Stella smiled shyly. "Hi."
"Um, hi," Dante said, stopping in his tracks. He'd never seen anyone quite like her before.
Stella looked like she'd like to run.
Dante held out his hand. "Dante Nova."
"Stella Terrano." She took his hand and smiled. She had a beautiful smile.
I'm going to like living here, Dante thought, smiling back. Stella blushed.
"And George. George, please tell me that's not poetry you're frantically scribbling."
George hugged his notebook to his chest and held out his free hand to shake Dante's. "Nice to meet you," he said. "And, so what, Aries."
"Dude, you're not in love again, are you? That'd make three times this term."
"But none of them were like her. She's a dream, a miracle, a gift from the gods."
"Does this paragon have a name?" Aries asked, sighing.
"Lucy Callahan," George said, and wandered off in a cloud.
Uh oh, Dante thought. Here we go again.
"Nice place," Dante said, looking around with approval.
"It grows on one," Aries said. "Hey, I'll show you your room. This is Walter, though I suppose you two have met."
"Hey, Dante," Walter said, "I've gotta go to class, but let's hang later, OK?"
Dante smiled. "Cool."
"And Stella. Stella, say hi to the man."
Stella smiled shyly. "Hi."
"Um, hi," Dante said, stopping in his tracks. He'd never seen anyone quite like her before.
Stella looked like she'd like to run.
Dante held out his hand. "Dante Nova."
"Stella Terrano." She took his hand and smiled. She had a beautiful smile.
I'm going to like living here, Dante thought, smiling back. Stella blushed.
"And George. George, please tell me that's not poetry you're frantically scribbling."
George hugged his notebook to his chest and held out his free hand to shake Dante's. "Nice to meet you," he said. "And, so what, Aries."
"Dude, you're not in love again, are you? That'd make three times this term."
"But none of them were like her. She's a dream, a miracle, a gift from the gods."
"Does this paragon have a name?" Aries asked, sighing.
"Lucy Callahan," George said, and wandered off in a cloud.
Uh oh, Dante thought. Here we go again.
Dante Goes to College
"You're sure you remembered to pack everything?" Xander asked for the third time.
"Xander, leave the boy alone," Orlando said, smiling. "He's only moving 100 miles away. If he forgot something we can take it to him on the weekend."
"Dad's right, I'll be fine," Dante said, giving them both a hug.
"Call if you need anything."
"Yes, of course."
"Taxi's waiting," Carlo said. "Lucky dog," he said as Dante passed. "See you in a year."
"See you in a year."
Once outside, Dante turned to look at the house where he'd spent his entire life so far. He was a man now, off to college and a whole new life.
He took a deep breath and got into the taxi.
"Xander, leave the boy alone," Orlando said, smiling. "He's only moving 100 miles away. If he forgot something we can take it to him on the weekend."
"Dad's right, I'll be fine," Dante said, giving them both a hug.
"Call if you need anything."
"Yes, of course."
"Taxi's waiting," Carlo said. "Lucky dog," he said as Dante passed. "See you in a year."
"See you in a year."
Once outside, Dante turned to look at the house where he'd spent his entire life so far. He was a man now, off to college and a whole new life.
He took a deep breath and got into the taxi.
Lucy
"Hey, Callahan, I heard you made the honor roll. What'd you do, cheat?"
"Probably kissed up to the teacher," the other boy said, making kissing noises.
"Very funny, you guys," Lucy said, laughing it off but fuming inside.
When she got home Audrey hadn't bothered to clean, again. She was having a hard time at work and spent all her time crying about how nobody liked her.
Well, duh. You're mean as a snake.
Lucy sneezed, and started to cough. Great. Now she was sick. She went upstairs and lay on her aunt's bed and read a book.
This was the last straw. As soon as she was better she was moving to college. Max wasn't speaking to her, Carlo kept tipping over their garbage can, and Dante and Mallory avoided her. Boys were so immature.
Get them before they got you. That's a lesson she'd learned the hard way after her father had walked out, leaving her mother heartbroken and suicidal. And Lucy ended up living with Audrey, who tried to be her mother but wasn't. Audrey was mean, like her brother, Lucy's dad. Lucy's mom had been sweet and kind and hadn't deserved ...
Lucy wiped her tears away angrily. She was sick. Being sick made you more emotional, that was all.
This weekend she'd go to college, where she planned to major in poli sci.
Some day she'd show them all.
Some day she'd run this town.
"Probably kissed up to the teacher," the other boy said, making kissing noises.
"Very funny, you guys," Lucy said, laughing it off but fuming inside.
When she got home Audrey hadn't bothered to clean, again. She was having a hard time at work and spent all her time crying about how nobody liked her.
Well, duh. You're mean as a snake.
Lucy sneezed, and started to cough. Great. Now she was sick. She went upstairs and lay on her aunt's bed and read a book.
This was the last straw. As soon as she was better she was moving to college. Max wasn't speaking to her, Carlo kept tipping over their garbage can, and Dante and Mallory avoided her. Boys were so immature.
Get them before they got you. That's a lesson she'd learned the hard way after her father had walked out, leaving her mother heartbroken and suicidal. And Lucy ended up living with Audrey, who tried to be her mother but wasn't. Audrey was mean, like her brother, Lucy's dad. Lucy's mom had been sweet and kind and hadn't deserved ...
Lucy wiped her tears away angrily. She was sick. Being sick made you more emotional, that was all.
This weekend she'd go to college, where she planned to major in poli sci.
Some day she'd show them all.
Some day she'd run this town.
Xena Nova Kane, Mommy
Porter had been promoted to exorcist and finally had a job he could believe in. Police psychic was to him a bunch of mumbo-jumbo, but as someone who'd had a demon living in his body for 200 years he could definitely get into ridding others of theirs.
He didn't really like the work outfit but Xena thought it made him look hot. Only Porter could get away with a skirt, beads and his body covered in symbols and manage to make it look good. And after she showed her appreciation when he came home from a long day at the "office" Porter didn't mind the outfit too much, either.
Selena was a toddler now (how quickly they grew up!) and Xena was finding to her neverending surprise that she liked being a mommy. It helped that Porter was so involved in his daughter's development as well. Between the two of them with their varying schedules Selena was well cared for and did not get in the way of either career. She was a happy child with a sweet disposition, although she did enjoy being queen of the castle. Why get that toy herself when Mallory could get it for her? For someone who didn't talk yet she was very good at making her wishes known.
Mallory was doing well in school, though he was hardly the whiz kid his girlfriend Morgan was turning out to be. He had yet to win any scholarship other than the good grades one, and she'd already sealed up at least three. For one thing, he hated chess. He would much rather play the guitar his dad bought him, or read a cookbook. Although he had chosen the scholar's path he wondered more and more if he had made the right decision.
"Son, it's not set in stone," Porter said as they all sat around the living room one night. "I just want you to do what you feel is best for you, whatever that is. I used to think knowledge was all there was to life, too, but I changed my mind."
"Baaaaaa!" Selena said, imitating her talking rabbit.
"I think Mom expects me to be a brainiac," Mallory said.
"I think Tiffany just wants you to be happy," Porter said.
Mallory shrugged. "Maybe."
"Don't let other people define you, Mallory. Do what's best for you."
"That's good advice, Sweetie," Xena said, getting up and kissing the top of Mallory's head. "You'd make a fabulous chef, for one." She picked up Selena. "Come on, little one, time for bed."
Mallory grinned. "You just want me to make dinner again."
Xena smiled sheepishly. "Busted."
"How does a nice chef salad sound?"
"Perfect."
He didn't really like the work outfit but Xena thought it made him look hot. Only Porter could get away with a skirt, beads and his body covered in symbols and manage to make it look good. And after she showed her appreciation when he came home from a long day at the "office" Porter didn't mind the outfit too much, either.
Selena was a toddler now (how quickly they grew up!) and Xena was finding to her neverending surprise that she liked being a mommy. It helped that Porter was so involved in his daughter's development as well. Between the two of them with their varying schedules Selena was well cared for and did not get in the way of either career. She was a happy child with a sweet disposition, although she did enjoy being queen of the castle. Why get that toy herself when Mallory could get it for her? For someone who didn't talk yet she was very good at making her wishes known.
Mallory was doing well in school, though he was hardly the whiz kid his girlfriend Morgan was turning out to be. He had yet to win any scholarship other than the good grades one, and she'd already sealed up at least three. For one thing, he hated chess. He would much rather play the guitar his dad bought him, or read a cookbook. Although he had chosen the scholar's path he wondered more and more if he had made the right decision.
"Son, it's not set in stone," Porter said as they all sat around the living room one night. "I just want you to do what you feel is best for you, whatever that is. I used to think knowledge was all there was to life, too, but I changed my mind."
"Baaaaaa!" Selena said, imitating her talking rabbit.
"I think Mom expects me to be a brainiac," Mallory said.
"I think Tiffany just wants you to be happy," Porter said.
Mallory shrugged. "Maybe."
"Don't let other people define you, Mallory. Do what's best for you."
"That's good advice, Sweetie," Xena said, getting up and kissing the top of Mallory's head. "You'd make a fabulous chef, for one." She picked up Selena. "Come on, little one, time for bed."
Mallory grinned. "You just want me to make dinner again."
Xena smiled sheepishly. "Busted."
"How does a nice chef salad sound?"
"Perfect."
Missing Mom
"Thanks for meeting me, Zaire," London said as Zaire slid into the seat across from her at the Llama and Plumbob.
"No problem," Zaire said, ordering a martini. "You want anything?"
"Still working on my beer, thanks."
"So, what's up, little sister?"
"I've been thinking about Mom a lot, is all."
"Me, too."
"You were always her favorite."
Zaire shrugged. "I was easier to raise."
London chuckled. "You've got me there. She was such a difficult woman to get close to."
"Cantankerous, even as a younger woman," Zaire agreed.
"And flighty. She never knew what she really wanted."
"And yet, she somehow managed to have it all."
"She was a pain in the butt."
"A real handful."
"I miss her like crazy," London said, biting her lip.
"Me, too," Zaire said, reaching across the table to pat her sister's hand.
"No problem," Zaire said, ordering a martini. "You want anything?"
"Still working on my beer, thanks."
"So, what's up, little sister?"
"I've been thinking about Mom a lot, is all."
"Me, too."
"You were always her favorite."
Zaire shrugged. "I was easier to raise."
London chuckled. "You've got me there. She was such a difficult woman to get close to."
"Cantankerous, even as a younger woman," Zaire agreed.
"And flighty. She never knew what she really wanted."
"And yet, she somehow managed to have it all."
"She was a pain in the butt."
"A real handful."
"I miss her like crazy," London said, biting her lip.
"Me, too," Zaire said, reaching across the table to pat her sister's hand.
Life with Alec and Jordan
"Hi Honey, how was your day?" Jordan kissed Alec on the cheek and went to flop down on the couch.
"Bizarre. You're home early."
"I got promoted again. Starting tomorrow I'm a SWAT Team Leader." Jordan pulled off her shoe and wiggled her toes. "No more fancy shoes, at least. I don't see how other women wear these every day."
Alec sat down next to her and rubbed her foot.
"Oh, that's heaven," she purred. "The girls home yet?"
"They're playing in Piper's room."
"How was Olivia's first day of school?"
"Good. Great. She hasn't stopped chattering about it."
"In what way was your day bizarre, Alec?"
"Beverly Patterson stopped by and told me it's my night to patrol for vampire activity."
Jordan stared at him. "The hairdresser wants you to patrol for vampires?"
"Xena called me soon after that and warned me she might stop by. Apparently since Lola died the mantel of vampire hunter has fallen on Xena but she thought she'd share."
"Thoughtful of her."
Alec shrugged. "She's got a month-old infant. I don't blame her, and to tell you the truth I'm looking forward to it."
"I'll bet. You'll be careful?"
"Of course," he kissed her. "Oh, and our six-year-old daughter beat me at chess this morning. I don't know whether to be proud or embarrassed."
"Wow. You're kidding."
"Nope. Guess all that smart milk paid off. I got a call from her teacher asking if we wanted to put her in the gifted program."
"She's in first grade."
"That's what I said. But we might want to look into private school, for both of them."
"Well," Jordan said, "that's a lot to think about. I think I'll change my clothes and make dinner. Spaghetti OK?"
"As if the girls would eat anything else."
Jordan smiled. "Good point. Spaghetti it is."
"Bizarre. You're home early."
"I got promoted again. Starting tomorrow I'm a SWAT Team Leader." Jordan pulled off her shoe and wiggled her toes. "No more fancy shoes, at least. I don't see how other women wear these every day."
Alec sat down next to her and rubbed her foot.
"Oh, that's heaven," she purred. "The girls home yet?"
"They're playing in Piper's room."
"How was Olivia's first day of school?"
"Good. Great. She hasn't stopped chattering about it."
"In what way was your day bizarre, Alec?"
"Beverly Patterson stopped by and told me it's my night to patrol for vampire activity."
Jordan stared at him. "The hairdresser wants you to patrol for vampires?"
"Xena called me soon after that and warned me she might stop by. Apparently since Lola died the mantel of vampire hunter has fallen on Xena but she thought she'd share."
"Thoughtful of her."
Alec shrugged. "She's got a month-old infant. I don't blame her, and to tell you the truth I'm looking forward to it."
"I'll bet. You'll be careful?"
"Of course," he kissed her. "Oh, and our six-year-old daughter beat me at chess this morning. I don't know whether to be proud or embarrassed."
"Wow. You're kidding."
"Nope. Guess all that smart milk paid off. I got a call from her teacher asking if we wanted to put her in the gifted program."
"She's in first grade."
"That's what I said. But we might want to look into private school, for both of them."
"Well," Jordan said, "that's a lot to think about. I think I'll change my clothes and make dinner. Spaghetti OK?"
"As if the girls would eat anything else."
Jordan smiled. "Good point. Spaghetti it is."
Zaire to the Rescue
"I'd say your feelings are perfectly natural, Ariel," her mother said. "You've been through a trauma, and of course you have mixed feelings about Milo. Every mother has those feelings once in a while, and yours are just magnified by the fact that this isn't, strictly speaking, your own child. Or one you asked for."
Ariel sighed. "I just feel like such a monster."
"You're not. I had some of the same feelings when I found out I was pregnant with Xanthe. It sidetracked my life, but of course I love her, and it all turned out all right career wise too. Sure I'm a little behind your father but I have another wonderful daughter to show for it. You'll grow to love this child. You're already so good with her, and love isn't always something we feel. It's something we do."
"When did you get to be so smart?"
Zaire laughed. "Gotta have something to show for all this gray hair. Now, what do you say I watch my newest grandchild while you treat yourself to an afternoon at the salon?"
Ariel gave her mother a fierce hug. "What a great idea. Thanks, Mom."
Ariel sighed. "I just feel like such a monster."
"You're not. I had some of the same feelings when I found out I was pregnant with Xanthe. It sidetracked my life, but of course I love her, and it all turned out all right career wise too. Sure I'm a little behind your father but I have another wonderful daughter to show for it. You'll grow to love this child. You're already so good with her, and love isn't always something we feel. It's something we do."
"When did you get to be so smart?"
Zaire laughed. "Gotta have something to show for all this gray hair. Now, what do you say I watch my newest grandchild while you treat yourself to an afternoon at the salon?"
Ariel gave her mother a fierce hug. "What a great idea. Thanks, Mom."
Baby Milo
Relax, Ariel. This will only hurt for a minute ...
How could you marry that monster?
Mom! Come quick! I think a spaceship just took Dad!
Ariel woke up in a cold sweat. Across the room the alien baby stirred in her sleep. Ariel got up automatically to go check on it. Her. On her.
The night Raj had been abducted was the worst one of her life. He'd been gone for hours and she thought he was never coming back, or if he did it would be in broad daylight and he'd die on the spot. And then he'd come back, disoriented and dizzy but ecstatic and full of news about everything he'd seen, and she'd been so grateful she'd just held his hand, barely listening to what he had to say, just happy to have him back.
And then it had turned out that he was carrying an alien child. What right did the aliens have to violate someone in that way? Castor and Raj had treated it like a scientific experiment, monitoring every step of the baby's progress, and Raj's. They hadn't told the rest of the family, hadn't wanted their lives to become a three ring circus if the media found out ...
And Ariel felt herself grow moody and detached. And resentful. She didn't like these feelings in herself and tried to overcome them, but there they were. A baby. She didn't want a baby. She'd had her child, and her career was going so well, and now she'd have to take another leave of absence to care for this ... thing.
She couldn't warm up to it. Here she was, a paranormal researcher, a UFO expert for crying out loud, and the sight of this little green creature made her stomach turn. She resented the baby for putting a halt to her career, resented Raj for being so happy about it, resented the fact that because he chose to remain a vampire she was responsible for this kid from sunup to sundown.
Saint Ariel Delacroix, fallen from her pedestal. She could fix every problem but her own. What had Xena said? All babies were alien invaders to some extent, but this one ... this one was actually an alien.
Milo started to cry and Ariel picked her up, automatically shushing her, and took her downstairs for her bottle. It was eleven in the morning and Morgan was at school. Raj was asleep in his coffin and she was here with this baby she didn't want.
She knew she was wrong to feel this way, and it surprised her because she'd always been so interested in the paranormal, but being interested in it and raising it were two different things.
This baby wasn't a scientific experiment. She was a flesh and blood creature who would be in Ariel's life forever. And it wasn't her fault.
She needed someone to talk to, and suddenly she knew exactly who she should call. She changed Milo's diaper, soothed her to sleep and put her in her crib before picking up the phone.
"Hello, Mom?"
How could you marry that monster?
Mom! Come quick! I think a spaceship just took Dad!
Ariel woke up in a cold sweat. Across the room the alien baby stirred in her sleep. Ariel got up automatically to go check on it. Her. On her.
The night Raj had been abducted was the worst one of her life. He'd been gone for hours and she thought he was never coming back, or if he did it would be in broad daylight and he'd die on the spot. And then he'd come back, disoriented and dizzy but ecstatic and full of news about everything he'd seen, and she'd been so grateful she'd just held his hand, barely listening to what he had to say, just happy to have him back.
And then it had turned out that he was carrying an alien child. What right did the aliens have to violate someone in that way? Castor and Raj had treated it like a scientific experiment, monitoring every step of the baby's progress, and Raj's. They hadn't told the rest of the family, hadn't wanted their lives to become a three ring circus if the media found out ...
And Ariel felt herself grow moody and detached. And resentful. She didn't like these feelings in herself and tried to overcome them, but there they were. A baby. She didn't want a baby. She'd had her child, and her career was going so well, and now she'd have to take another leave of absence to care for this ... thing.
She couldn't warm up to it. Here she was, a paranormal researcher, a UFO expert for crying out loud, and the sight of this little green creature made her stomach turn. She resented the baby for putting a halt to her career, resented Raj for being so happy about it, resented the fact that because he chose to remain a vampire she was responsible for this kid from sunup to sundown.
Saint Ariel Delacroix, fallen from her pedestal. She could fix every problem but her own. What had Xena said? All babies were alien invaders to some extent, but this one ... this one was actually an alien.
Milo started to cry and Ariel picked her up, automatically shushing her, and took her downstairs for her bottle. It was eleven in the morning and Morgan was at school. Raj was asleep in his coffin and she was here with this baby she didn't want.
She knew she was wrong to feel this way, and it surprised her because she'd always been so interested in the paranormal, but being interested in it and raising it were two different things.
This baby wasn't a scientific experiment. She was a flesh and blood creature who would be in Ariel's life forever. And it wasn't her fault.
She needed someone to talk to, and suddenly she knew exactly who she should call. She changed Milo's diaper, soothed her to sleep and put her in her crib before picking up the phone.
"Hello, Mom?"
Alien Baby
"So, I came over as soon as I could, Morgan," Mallory said. "What's the big emergency?"
"No emergency, I just wanted to show you something. Or someone."
"Someone?"
"My new baby sister. Shhhh, she's sleeping."
Morgan and Mallory crept upstairs and peeked into Ariel's room, where a nursery had been set up in the corner. They crept toward the crib, and there they saw ...
"Morgan, she's green."
"I know. Isn't she beautiful?"
"I guess, but ... she's green."
Morgan giggled. "Uh huh. You see, my dad was watching the stars one night ... "
"No emergency, I just wanted to show you something. Or someone."
"Someone?"
"My new baby sister. Shhhh, she's sleeping."
Morgan and Mallory crept upstairs and peeked into Ariel's room, where a nursery had been set up in the corner. They crept toward the crib, and there they saw ..."Morgan, she's green."
"I know. Isn't she beautiful?"
"I guess, but ... she's green."
Morgan giggled. "Uh huh. You see, my dad was watching the stars one night ... "
Bad Cop, Good Cop
"How does the phrase, 'grounded for life' sound, Antonio?" Orlando asked. Outside their house the lights of the squad car flashed blue and red. Orlando's friend from the police station waved goodbye as he got back into the car.
"I think it sounds like I ought to get my own place," Antonio muttered.
"Believe me, it's no picnic for your Pop and me either," Orlando said. "What the heck were you thinking, climbing a bridge?"
"It was Max's idea."
"Oh, so if Max also said, 'hey, Tonio, let's jump off this bridge' you'd do that too?"
"No."
"You're responsible for your own actions, Antonio, and it's time you started paying the consequences. Your car and television rights have just been revoked, and you're grounded for the rest of the school year."
"What? Man, that bites."
"Prove to me you deserve to be treated like a responsible young adult and I'll consider shortening your sentence," Orlando said. "But step out of line again and I'm going to have to come up with a harsher penalty."
"Like what? A straightjacket?" Antonio muttered.
"How does military school sound?"
Antonio turned a paler shade than normal.
"Go to bed, Antonio. You have to get up for school in an hour."
"Too bad I'm not grounded from school," Antonio muttered, but he went.
"And you, Carlo," Orlando said to his middle son, who sat on the steps watching the whole thing sleepily, "you're grounded for a month for not coming to me right away."
"But ... "
"One more word and I'll make it two."
Carlo stomped his way upstairs.
Orlando sighed.
Xander put his hand on his shoulder. "Way to handle things, honey."
"I hate being the bad cop. You do it next time."
Xander smiled. "Come on, I'll make us some breakfast."
"I think it sounds like I ought to get my own place," Antonio muttered.
"Believe me, it's no picnic for your Pop and me either," Orlando said. "What the heck were you thinking, climbing a bridge?"
"It was Max's idea."
"Oh, so if Max also said, 'hey, Tonio, let's jump off this bridge' you'd do that too?"
"No."
"You're responsible for your own actions, Antonio, and it's time you started paying the consequences. Your car and television rights have just been revoked, and you're grounded for the rest of the school year."
"What? Man, that bites."
"Prove to me you deserve to be treated like a responsible young adult and I'll consider shortening your sentence," Orlando said. "But step out of line again and I'm going to have to come up with a harsher penalty."
"Like what? A straightjacket?" Antonio muttered.
"How does military school sound?"
Antonio turned a paler shade than normal.
"Go to bed, Antonio. You have to get up for school in an hour."
"Too bad I'm not grounded from school," Antonio muttered, but he went.
"And you, Carlo," Orlando said to his middle son, who sat on the steps watching the whole thing sleepily, "you're grounded for a month for not coming to me right away."
"But ... "
"One more word and I'll make it two."
Carlo stomped his way upstairs.
Orlando sighed.
Xander put his hand on his shoulder. "Way to handle things, honey."
"I hate being the bad cop. You do it next time."
Xander smiled. "Come on, I'll make us some breakfast."
Looking for Trouble
Max's parents fought all the time now, and he couldn't stand it. So one night while they were shouting, again, he slipped out and drove to Carlo's house. He didn't care that he was still grounded. He'd like to ground them.
He threw rocks at Carlo's window until his friend opened it. "Max, it's two in the morning."
"I know. Let's go cause some trouble."
"I'm sorry, but no."
"Aw, come on, Carlo, don't be a goody two shoes."
"Max, I have a huge history final tomorrow and I want to get a good grade on it."
"I'll go," Antonio said, sticking his head out of his own bedroom window.
"Sweet," Max said. "Meet me out front."
"You shouldn't do this, Tonio," Carlo said. "You're already on Dad's s**t list for that stunt you pulled at school."
"Aw, dry up, Carlo, and if you narc on me I'll beat the snot out of you."
Carlo snorted. "You and what army?"
"Come on, Carlo, be a pal," Max said, "don't snitch."
"OK," Carlo said, "but for you, not for him."
"Whatever," Antonio said, and pulled his head back inside.
Minutes later the two boys hit the road in Max's dad's car.
He threw rocks at Carlo's window until his friend opened it. "Max, it's two in the morning."
"I know. Let's go cause some trouble."
"I'm sorry, but no."
"Aw, come on, Carlo, don't be a goody two shoes."
"Max, I have a huge history final tomorrow and I want to get a good grade on it."
"I'll go," Antonio said, sticking his head out of his own bedroom window.
"Sweet," Max said. "Meet me out front."
"You shouldn't do this, Tonio," Carlo said. "You're already on Dad's s**t list for that stunt you pulled at school."
"Aw, dry up, Carlo, and if you narc on me I'll beat the snot out of you."
Carlo snorted. "You and what army?"
"Come on, Carlo, be a pal," Max said, "don't snitch."
"OK," Carlo said, "but for you, not for him."
"Whatever," Antonio said, and pulled his head back inside.
Minutes later the two boys hit the road in Max's dad's car.
Waverly Apologizes
"So I called Max to apologize and then I drove to Dante's house and broke up with him. I never should have said I'd go steady with him in the first place."
"How'd he take it?" Mallory asked.
"He was upset but I pointed out he deserved a girl who was head over heels for him and that just wasn't me. I think he'll be OK. I apologized to Carlo, too. And Antonio, the smart ass wanted to know if he got one too."
"I'm proud of you, Waverly," Mallory said, putting his arm around her, "that took guts."
"So, you and me, we're good, right?"
"Waverly, you know I think of you as a kind of sister," Mallory said, "and you're really important to me."
"But?"
"This is going to sound conceited."
"But?"
"I know you have other feelings for me," he said, "and I'm really sorry, but I just can't return them."
"I know," Waverly studied her toes.
"I want you to be happy, Waverly, but just like you told Dante, you deserve someone who's head over heels for you."
Waverly stood up, not looking at him. "I've ... got to go."
"OK. We still friends?"
"Yes," she said, and walked quickly out his front door.
"How'd he take it?" Mallory asked.
"He was upset but I pointed out he deserved a girl who was head over heels for him and that just wasn't me. I think he'll be OK. I apologized to Carlo, too. And Antonio, the smart ass wanted to know if he got one too."
"I'm proud of you, Waverly," Mallory said, putting his arm around her, "that took guts."
"So, you and me, we're good, right?"
"Waverly, you know I think of you as a kind of sister," Mallory said, "and you're really important to me."
"But?"
"This is going to sound conceited."
"But?"
"I know you have other feelings for me," he said, "and I'm really sorry, but I just can't return them."
"I know," Waverly studied her toes.
"I want you to be happy, Waverly, but just like you told Dante, you deserve someone who's head over heels for you."
Waverly stood up, not looking at him. "I've ... got to go."
"OK. We still friends?"
"Yes," she said, and walked quickly out his front door.
Waverly Has a Realization
Waverly had thought long and hard about her behavior these past few weeks and realized that it had been a knee-jerk reaction, letting her hormones get the best of her, only thinking about herself ...
In short, she had been acting just like her mother.
All of the grownups in her life were so messed up. Her father let his temper make his decisions for him. Her mother flirted with anything that breathed. Tiffany was a selfish, self-absorbed prima donna and Brittney ... Brittney was a snake.
Not that that was any excuse for her own behavior.
Waverly took a deep breath and picked up the phone.
In short, she had been acting just like her mother.
All of the grownups in her life were so messed up. Her father let his temper make his decisions for him. Her mother flirted with anything that breathed. Tiffany was a selfish, self-absorbed prima donna and Brittney ... Brittney was a snake.
Not that that was any excuse for her own behavior.
Waverly took a deep breath and picked up the phone.
Not How She Thought It Would Be
"Hey, Skye, are you OK?" Ariel asked, sitting down next to her at the bar.
"Go away," Skye said, giving her a look of such venom that Ariel moved away. "How could you marry that monster?" Skye asked as Ariel was about to leave.
"I don't ... "
"Raj," Skye hissed. "He ruined my life, you know, and he gets to have a happy ending. How could you marry someone like that?"
Ariel sat down again. "Skye, I think you've had too much to drink."
"Stop treating me like I'm a child," she said. "Everyone treats me like I'm some kind of child. I know exactly what I'm saying. Everyone gets to be happy except me. Where's my happy ending?"
"You're married to a wonderful man, Skye."
Skye laughed bitterly. "I know you two have always had the secret hots for each other, but trust me, he's a pain in the ass to be married to. So condescending and perfect and he treats me like I'm twelve."
"Maybe if you acted your age he wouldn't," Ariel said, running out of patience.
"All I wanted was to marry Alec," Skye said, "but Raj took care of that. And when I was finally myself again he'd found the love of his life. And I can't even hate her because she's always been decent to me. And even the monster gets to be married and happy. It's NOT FAIR!"
"Life isn't fair, Skye. You make what you can of it. Apollo's a great guy. Maybe you two should see a counselor."
"Or maybe we should just get a divorce," Skye said, slamming her drink down and getting up to leave.
"Skye, you may want to sober up before you go home," Ariel said. "Let me buy you some coffee."
Skye started to cry. "Stop being so nice to me."
Ariel put her arm around her and led her from the bar.
"Go away," Skye said, giving her a look of such venom that Ariel moved away. "How could you marry that monster?" Skye asked as Ariel was about to leave.
"I don't ... "
"Raj," Skye hissed. "He ruined my life, you know, and he gets to have a happy ending. How could you marry someone like that?"
Ariel sat down again. "Skye, I think you've had too much to drink."
"Stop treating me like I'm a child," she said. "Everyone treats me like I'm some kind of child. I know exactly what I'm saying. Everyone gets to be happy except me. Where's my happy ending?"
"You're married to a wonderful man, Skye."
Skye laughed bitterly. "I know you two have always had the secret hots for each other, but trust me, he's a pain in the ass to be married to. So condescending and perfect and he treats me like I'm twelve."
"Maybe if you acted your age he wouldn't," Ariel said, running out of patience.
"All I wanted was to marry Alec," Skye said, "but Raj took care of that. And when I was finally myself again he'd found the love of his life. And I can't even hate her because she's always been decent to me. And even the monster gets to be married and happy. It's NOT FAIR!"
"Life isn't fair, Skye. You make what you can of it. Apollo's a great guy. Maybe you two should see a counselor."
"Or maybe we should just get a divorce," Skye said, slamming her drink down and getting up to leave.
"Skye, you may want to sober up before you go home," Ariel said. "Let me buy you some coffee."
Skye started to cry. "Stop being so nice to me."
Ariel put her arm around her and led her from the bar.
Family Spat
"Hey, Apollo, just wanted to stop by and say I'm sorry about your Gran. She and I didn't always see eye to eye, but she was a heck of a woman."
"Thanks, Dad. Come on in." Apollo opened the door to let Spike in.
Spike whistled. "Been doing some work on the old homestead I see. Not bad, son."
"Thanks."
"Your Gran left us some money, London and me both. Your mom's making me spend it on practical stuff this time. Walls with no holes in them, a new roof. Women."
Apollo grinned. "They're a mystery, all right. Hey, Max, where do you think you're going? You're grounded." Apollo intercepted his son as he headed for the door, jiggling the car keys.
"Mom said I could go out."
"Well, you can't. Skye! Get down here."
Skye came downstairs in her bathrobe, looking cross. "What."
"Max is grounded for breaking into our liquor cabinet, or have you forgotten?"
"Good on you, kid," Spike said. Max grinned.
"Don't encourage him, Dad," Apollo said. "Max, hand over the keys."
"Aw, Dad!"
"Now, son."
Max tossed the keys at Apollo and stormed upstairs, slamming the door to his room.
"And you," Apollo said to his wife, "Stop undermining me. The kid needs discipline, and you're not helping."
"Oh, that's right, blame it on me! I'm such a rotten mother! Poor dumb stupid Skye can't do anything right!" Skye ran back upstairs in tears.
Apollo sat down on the sofa and groaned. "She's just so moody lately. One day we're all hearts and roses, and the next she's like this."
Spike sat down next to his son and stretched his legs. "Gotta love those unstable women. Maybe she's going through the change."
"She's 37. It's a bit early."
Spike shrugged. "Then maybe she's just nuts." He stood up. "Gotta go, Apollo. Call if you need to talk."
"OK, Dad, thanks."
Skye came back downstairs after Spike had left and walked past her husband without a word. She was dressed to the nines.
"Where are you going?"
"Out. Or am I grounded too?" Skye slammed the front door behind her.
Apollo sat on the couch for a long time after she left, listening to Max beating up the punching bag in his room. Just when had he become the only adult around here, he wondered.
Something had to change.
"Thanks, Dad. Come on in." Apollo opened the door to let Spike in.
Spike whistled. "Been doing some work on the old homestead I see. Not bad, son."
"Thanks."
"Your Gran left us some money, London and me both. Your mom's making me spend it on practical stuff this time. Walls with no holes in them, a new roof. Women."
Apollo grinned. "They're a mystery, all right. Hey, Max, where do you think you're going? You're grounded." Apollo intercepted his son as he headed for the door, jiggling the car keys.
"Mom said I could go out."
"Well, you can't. Skye! Get down here."
Skye came downstairs in her bathrobe, looking cross. "What."
"Max is grounded for breaking into our liquor cabinet, or have you forgotten?"
"Good on you, kid," Spike said. Max grinned.
"Don't encourage him, Dad," Apollo said. "Max, hand over the keys."
"Aw, Dad!"
"Now, son."
Max tossed the keys at Apollo and stormed upstairs, slamming the door to his room.
"And you," Apollo said to his wife, "Stop undermining me. The kid needs discipline, and you're not helping."
"Oh, that's right, blame it on me! I'm such a rotten mother! Poor dumb stupid Skye can't do anything right!" Skye ran back upstairs in tears.
Apollo sat down on the sofa and groaned. "She's just so moody lately. One day we're all hearts and roses, and the next she's like this."
Spike sat down next to his son and stretched his legs. "Gotta love those unstable women. Maybe she's going through the change."
"She's 37. It's a bit early."
Spike shrugged. "Then maybe she's just nuts." He stood up. "Gotta go, Apollo. Call if you need to talk."
"OK, Dad, thanks."
Skye came back downstairs after Spike had left and walked past her husband without a word. She was dressed to the nines.
"Where are you going?"
"Out. Or am I grounded too?" Skye slammed the front door behind her.
Apollo sat on the couch for a long time after she left, listening to Max beating up the punching bag in his room. Just when had he become the only adult around here, he wondered.
Something had to change.
Family Duties
"Xena? There's someone at the door for you," Mallory said.
"Well, tell them to come back," she said, trying to shush Selena, who wouldn't stop crying. "I'm a little busy."
"I'll take a turn with the baby," Mallory said, reaching for his sister. "The woman was pretty insistent that she talk to you."
"Well, OK, hold her like this, and ... "
"Mom? I think I can handle it," Mallory said, smiling as he took the baby. "I've done this before."
Xena, glad for the break, went downstairs to meet her visitor, hoping they weren't from the press. She was wearing one of Porter's shirts and her oldest pair of jeans, and she hadn't washed her hair today.
It was Beverly Patterson.
"I'm sorry to interrupt you," Beverly said. "I know you've got a new baby in the house, but we've got to talk."
"Beverly, what a surprise," Xena said. She barely knew the woman standing on her front porch. "Come on in."
Over coffee in the dining room Beverly said, "I'm sorry about your grandmother. I know you must all miss her."
"Yeah, it's been hard, but we're doing OK."
"You've probably been too busy with your baby to notice the vampires are acting up again."
"Um, no, I didn't notice."
"Xena, someone needs to take Lola's place as the vampire hunter in this town. That someone is you."
"OK, time out," Xena said. "I thought you were a hairdresser."
Bev shrugged. "A girl's gotta have a hobby. I'm a member of the Council."
"The City Council?"
"The vampire observation council. We've been around a long time, helping to control vampire activity worldwide. The Phoenixes aren't the only family of hunters, although you are one of the oldest. With Lola out of the picture ... the thing is, Xena, you should have taken over for her long ago, but she was doing such a good job and we knew you'd be resistant, so ... we let it go."
"Why me? Why not another member of my family?"
"It's clearly been you for some time now. The vampire hunter is always very strong, incredibly so, and quick on their feet. That's you."
"Or either of my brothers. I'm still figuring out how to diaper a baby. I don't have time for this."
"Ever wonder why an itty little thing like you was able to throw a grown man halfway across his own front yard?"
"How did you know about that?"
"I have my sources."
"Meaning, you talked to Jack," Xena said. "So what. I work out."
Bev snorted. "So do I, Sugar, but I couldn't lift Porter Kane, let alone throw him."
Xena sighed. "So, what have they been doing?"
"Biting people, what else. Three college students this week."
"Who?"
"No one you know. Someone's got to make them behave."
"What makes you think they'll listen to me?"
"Just give them a show of strength. Make an example. They'll fall into line. Vampires are very strong on the self-preservation thing. Let them know the rules that Lola set still stand."
Xena sighed. "I've got a new baby."
"I know, I'm sorry. The timing's awful."
Xena thought for a long time, and then said, "Bev, I may be 'the one' but my family's no group of pushovers. Know what's stronger than one vampire hunter?"
"What?"
"A whole family of them."
"Well, tell them to come back," she said, trying to shush Selena, who wouldn't stop crying. "I'm a little busy."
"I'll take a turn with the baby," Mallory said, reaching for his sister. "The woman was pretty insistent that she talk to you."
"Well, OK, hold her like this, and ... "
"Mom? I think I can handle it," Mallory said, smiling as he took the baby. "I've done this before."
Xena, glad for the break, went downstairs to meet her visitor, hoping they weren't from the press. She was wearing one of Porter's shirts and her oldest pair of jeans, and she hadn't washed her hair today.
It was Beverly Patterson.
"I'm sorry to interrupt you," Beverly said. "I know you've got a new baby in the house, but we've got to talk."
"Beverly, what a surprise," Xena said. She barely knew the woman standing on her front porch. "Come on in."
Over coffee in the dining room Beverly said, "I'm sorry about your grandmother. I know you must all miss her."
"Yeah, it's been hard, but we're doing OK."
"You've probably been too busy with your baby to notice the vampires are acting up again."
"Um, no, I didn't notice."
"Xena, someone needs to take Lola's place as the vampire hunter in this town. That someone is you."
"OK, time out," Xena said. "I thought you were a hairdresser."
Bev shrugged. "A girl's gotta have a hobby. I'm a member of the Council."
"The City Council?"
"The vampire observation council. We've been around a long time, helping to control vampire activity worldwide. The Phoenixes aren't the only family of hunters, although you are one of the oldest. With Lola out of the picture ... the thing is, Xena, you should have taken over for her long ago, but she was doing such a good job and we knew you'd be resistant, so ... we let it go."
"Why me? Why not another member of my family?"
"It's clearly been you for some time now. The vampire hunter is always very strong, incredibly so, and quick on their feet. That's you."
"Or either of my brothers. I'm still figuring out how to diaper a baby. I don't have time for this."
"Ever wonder why an itty little thing like you was able to throw a grown man halfway across his own front yard?"
"How did you know about that?"
"I have my sources."
"Meaning, you talked to Jack," Xena said. "So what. I work out."
Bev snorted. "So do I, Sugar, but I couldn't lift Porter Kane, let alone throw him."
Xena sighed. "So, what have they been doing?"
"Biting people, what else. Three college students this week."
"Who?"
"No one you know. Someone's got to make them behave."
"What makes you think they'll listen to me?"
"Just give them a show of strength. Make an example. They'll fall into line. Vampires are very strong on the self-preservation thing. Let them know the rules that Lola set still stand."
Xena sighed. "I've got a new baby."
"I know, I'm sorry. The timing's awful."
Xena thought for a long time, and then said, "Bev, I may be 'the one' but my family's no group of pushovers. Know what's stronger than one vampire hunter?"
"What?"
"A whole family of them."
The Witch Is Dead
"Ding dong, the witch is dead," Solange said, smiling wickedly as she sat down across from the Countess at their usual table.
"So vat."
"So what? Have you no imagination? There's no one watching us anymore, that's so what, my dear Countess. Imagine the possibilities."
The Countess smiled slowly. "I never thought of that."
"That's because you don't have vision. You've been a vampire so long you've forgotten how to have fun. A toast," Solange held up her glass. "To Lola Phoenix Andrews. May she rot in peace."
"Skol," said the Countess.
"And now, Countess, I'd like to declare today a holiday."
"Vat kind of holiday?"
"Why, haven't you heard?" Solange said, smiling. "It's bite an acquaintance day."
"So vat."
"So what? Have you no imagination? There's no one watching us anymore, that's so what, my dear Countess. Imagine the possibilities."
The Countess smiled slowly. "I never thought of that."
"That's because you don't have vision. You've been a vampire so long you've forgotten how to have fun. A toast," Solange held up her glass. "To Lola Phoenix Andrews. May she rot in peace."
"Skol," said the Countess.
"And now, Countess, I'd like to declare today a holiday."
"Vat kind of holiday?"
"Why, haven't you heard?" Solange said, smiling. "It's bite an acquaintance day."
Her Name Was Lola
Lola Phoenix, Simmywood legend, died of natural causes at the age of 82 today in her home. She leaves behind two daughters, six grandchildren and nine great-grandchildren. Her family has requested that in lieu of flowers donations be made to the underprivileged children's education fund.
Ms. Phoenix was known for her outstanding acting in several movies as well as her award-winning direction. Friends remember her as someone who was very involved with keeping her community safe.
Our condolences to her family and friends.
Ms. Phoenix was known for her outstanding acting in several movies as well as her award-winning direction. Friends remember her as someone who was very involved with keeping her community safe.
Our condolences to her family and friends.
Jack Loves Lola
Having a rich girlfriend had its advantages. Lola took one look at Jack's house and called her decorator. She also bought him a nice television and a pool table.
But Jack didn't care about any of that. Sure, it was nice to be able to see the expressions on people's faces on TV now, and the pool table rocked, but what he really liked was having Lola in his life. She was fun to have around, and there was something to be said for a woman with experience, if you got his drift.
"You feel weird, dating someone as old as me, Jack?"
"Nah, I just feel ... grateful." It was true. Here was this great dame who actually got him, liked him, made him laugh.
She smiled. "Let you in on a secret, Jack. Getting older doesn't make you a different person. I still feel 25 inside, it's just my outside that got older. I look in the mirror and think, who the heck is that old broad?"
Jack laughed. "If every 'old broad' looked like you, no one would mind getting old."
"You say the sweetest things. Let's go out to lunch."
"Let me pay this time," he said.
"Jack, I'm old, as mentioned, and richer than Croessus. If I don't spend it on you, who am I going to spend it on?"
They'd been going out for about a month when Jack woke up to his doorbell ringing insistently.
"Sign for this," said the guy at the door, handing him an envelope.
"What is it?" Jack asked, yawning.
"Some old broad died and left you a bunch of money," the guy said, indifferently. "Have a nice day."
Jack stared at the envelope in his hand for what felt like eternity before locking his front door and proceeding to get very, very drunk.
But Jack didn't care about any of that. Sure, it was nice to be able to see the expressions on people's faces on TV now, and the pool table rocked, but what he really liked was having Lola in his life. She was fun to have around, and there was something to be said for a woman with experience, if you got his drift.
"You feel weird, dating someone as old as me, Jack?"
"Nah, I just feel ... grateful." It was true. Here was this great dame who actually got him, liked him, made him laugh.
She smiled. "Let you in on a secret, Jack. Getting older doesn't make you a different person. I still feel 25 inside, it's just my outside that got older. I look in the mirror and think, who the heck is that old broad?"
Jack laughed. "If every 'old broad' looked like you, no one would mind getting old."
"You say the sweetest things. Let's go out to lunch."
"Let me pay this time," he said.
"Jack, I'm old, as mentioned, and richer than Croessus. If I don't spend it on you, who am I going to spend it on?"
They'd been going out for about a month when Jack woke up to his doorbell ringing insistently.
"Sign for this," said the guy at the door, handing him an envelope.
"What is it?" Jack asked, yawning.
"Some old broad died and left you a bunch of money," the guy said, indifferently. "Have a nice day."
Jack stared at the envelope in his hand for what felt like eternity before locking his front door and proceeding to get very, very drunk.
Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous
SimStyle Magazine Presents ...
We have a real treat for you this month, loyal readers: a rare glimpse into the palatial home of Simmywood Legend Lola Phoenix. Check out this crib, folks! It even has its own bowling alley.
Since the sad demise of her loving husband Tyson, the legend also known as Mrs. Andrews has shared her home with one Heidi Ruscewitz, though the diva mantains the relationship is strictly platonic.
When asked if there's anyone in her life now, Lola merely smiled mysteriously and said, "Wouldn't you like to know."
So, here are some pix, folks. Enjoy! Maybe if this reporter plays her cards right she'll get invited to a party here sometime. One can only imagine what that would be like.
Until next time!
Selena Kane
"Come on, Xena, push, you can do it," Porter urged.
"I don't want to," she said, "I want to go to sleep now. Leave me alone."
"Just a little more," he said, "the baby's almost here."
"I am never doing this again," she said, gritting her teeth.
"Whatever you say. Come on, Xena, I know you can do it."
Outside the door, Mallory heard Xena's scream and then a thin small cry. Everything was quiet and then Porter opened the door, smiling and holding a baby. Xena lay on the bed behind him, propped up with pillows and looking exhausted but happy.
"Mallory," Porter said, "meet your new baby sister, Selena."
"I don't want to," she said, "I want to go to sleep now. Leave me alone."
"Just a little more," he said, "the baby's almost here."
"I am never doing this again," she said, gritting her teeth.
"Whatever you say. Come on, Xena, I know you can do it."Outside the door, Mallory heard Xena's scream and then a thin small cry. Everything was quiet and then Porter opened the door, smiling and holding a baby. Xena lay on the bed behind him, propped up with pillows and looking exhausted but happy.
"Mallory," Porter said, "meet your new baby sister, Selena."
A Visit With Lola
"Geez, Jack, you're a mess," Lola said the next day when he showed up at her door. "Have an argument with a weed whacker?"
"That's me, enemy of gardening implements."
"Well, come on in," she said. "My roommate's at work so we have the place to ourselves."
And what a place it was. Jack had only seen its like through a telephoto lens before; a sprawling palazzo with all the toys a person could want. He whistled. "Nice digs."
She looked nice, too. He had no idea how old she was but she still had a heck of a figure.
She caught him eyeing her and smiled. "Care for a drink?"
He hadn't meant to allow himself to be seduced. Maybe it was the sun, or the surroundings, or the drink, but they ended up in bed and it was fantastic. Jack hadn't had that much fun in ages. They fell asleep, and when he woke up it was early evening.
"Crap, is that the time?" he said, looking at his watch. He stood up and pulled on his clothes in a hurry. Shorty didn't like it when he was late. "I'm sorry, Lola, I've got to get to work."
"No problem," she said. "See you round?"
"Yeah," he said, blowing her a kiss, "see you round."
He left the house whistling.
In the Park
Waverly slipped out of the house while her parents were upstairs and went to sit in the park. It was late but she needed to think. Mallory was right, she had behaved badly, but she had only wanted to have a little fun, and then Max had made her so mad, and ...
"Out a little late, aren't you, kid?" said a familiar voice.
She looked up to see Jack standing there.
"What are you doing here?"
"I live right over there." He pointed to a house not far from hers. "I like to come to the park at night. It's quiet. Aren't you out past your bedtime?"
She shrugged. "Not like they'd notice."
He sat down next to her. He smelled like a bar. He lit a cigarette and looked out over the park.
"Why are boys so stupid?" she asked.
"A very good question, for which there is no good answer," he said. "Boys are boys who grow up to be men, most of whom are also stupid. Get used to it, kid."
"I'm so confused," she said. "I just wanted to have a good time and now everyone's mad at me."
"Join the club," he said, "everyone's confused. Grownups just get better at hiding it."
"I'm just a kid, I don't want to settle down or go steady or have just one boyfriend but all the boys are so jealous ... ooh, it makes me crazy."
Jack laughed. "Boy do I know what you mean." He rubbed his jaw where Ashley had hit him.
"How's your face?"
"Improving. I had to drop out of that beauty contest though."
She grinned. "Too bad. I'm sure you would've won."
"Yeah. Face like mine? Shoo-in." He stood up. "Let me walk you home. It's late, bad people might be out."
"Like you?"
"Guilty as charged. But I promise to deliver you safe to grandma's house."
She stood up and they walked across the park. "Thanks, Jack."
"For what?"
"For listening. No one ever seems to listen to me at home."
"Happy to oblige, kid."
"Out a little late, aren't you, kid?" said a familiar voice.
She looked up to see Jack standing there.
"What are you doing here?"
"I live right over there." He pointed to a house not far from hers. "I like to come to the park at night. It's quiet. Aren't you out past your bedtime?"
She shrugged. "Not like they'd notice."
He sat down next to her. He smelled like a bar. He lit a cigarette and looked out over the park.
"Why are boys so stupid?" she asked.
"A very good question, for which there is no good answer," he said. "Boys are boys who grow up to be men, most of whom are also stupid. Get used to it, kid."
"I'm so confused," she said. "I just wanted to have a good time and now everyone's mad at me."
"Join the club," he said, "everyone's confused. Grownups just get better at hiding it."
"I'm just a kid, I don't want to settle down or go steady or have just one boyfriend but all the boys are so jealous ... ooh, it makes me crazy."
Jack laughed. "Boy do I know what you mean." He rubbed his jaw where Ashley had hit him.
"How's your face?"
"Improving. I had to drop out of that beauty contest though."
She grinned. "Too bad. I'm sure you would've won."
"Yeah. Face like mine? Shoo-in." He stood up. "Let me walk you home. It's late, bad people might be out."
"Like you?"
"Guilty as charged. But I promise to deliver you safe to grandma's house."
She stood up and they walked across the park. "Thanks, Jack."
"For what?"
"For listening. No one ever seems to listen to me at home."
"Happy to oblige, kid."
Still Friends
"So," Carlo said, staggering to his feet and helping Max up from the floor, "we still friends?"
Max grinned through his bloody nose. "Of course."
"Women," Carlo said.
"Tell me about it."
They both laughed.
"Come on over to my house," Max said, "my parents are out for the night. We can get drunk and listen to music."
"You're on."
Max grinned through his bloody nose. "Of course."
"Women," Carlo said.
"Tell me about it."
They both laughed.
"Come on over to my house," Max said, "my parents are out for the night. We can get drunk and listen to music."
"You're on."
One Big Mess
Waverly's party was off to a great start, until she kissed Dante in front of Max.
"Waverly, what's the deal?" Max said, stomping his foot and looking menacing. "I thought you were going out with me."
"She's going steady with me now, Max," Dante said, calmly.
"What? Waverly, that's not ... auugh," Max said.
Dante went to talk to Carlo. Waverly shrugged. "Max, if you wanted to go steady you should have asked me."
Max looked horrified. "Go steady? Who said anything about going steady?"
"Well, then, there you have it," she said primly.
"Waverly, you told me you didn't even like Dante all that much," Max said under his breath.
She shrugged. "He asked me. Besides, Max, you can't talk. I know you've been smooching Lucy."
"Who's been smooching Lucy?" Carlo asked, hotly.
"Max," Waverly said.
Carlo turned to Lucy. "Is that true?"
Lucy shrugged. "So what."
Carlo punched Max in the nose and they went down in a flurry of fists.
"That wasn't very nice, Waverly," Mallory said quietly.
"I .. didn't mean for them to fight."
"I think you did," he said. "Is it true you went out with Antonio last night?"
"Who told you that?"
"Antonio. He's bragging to all his friends. You're really going to hurt Dante's feelings."
Waverly pouted. "It was just a little date."
"I think you just like the attention," Mallory said, "and you don't seem to care who you hurt. You're acting just like Lucy, only at least she's honest about it."
"That's a really mean thing to say, Mallory."
"I'm your best friend. If I don't say it, who will?"
"Some best friend."
"Well, keep this up and I may change my mind," he said.
"Mallory, walk me home," Morgan said. "This is way too Beverly Hills 90210 for me."
Mallory put his arm around his girlfriend. "See you, Waverly. Try to be good, OK?" He touched her under her chin and walked off with Morgan.
Waverly watched them go, heartbroken. All she had ever wanted was for Mallory to look at her the way he looked at Morgan.
And now her life was one big mess.
"Waverly, what's the deal?" Max said, stomping his foot and looking menacing. "I thought you were going out with me."
"She's going steady with me now, Max," Dante said, calmly.
"What? Waverly, that's not ... auugh," Max said.
Dante went to talk to Carlo. Waverly shrugged. "Max, if you wanted to go steady you should have asked me."
Max looked horrified. "Go steady? Who said anything about going steady?"
"Well, then, there you have it," she said primly.
"Waverly, you told me you didn't even like Dante all that much," Max said under his breath.
She shrugged. "He asked me. Besides, Max, you can't talk. I know you've been smooching Lucy."
"Who's been smooching Lucy?" Carlo asked, hotly.
"Max," Waverly said.
Carlo turned to Lucy. "Is that true?"
Lucy shrugged. "So what."
Carlo punched Max in the nose and they went down in a flurry of fists.
"That wasn't very nice, Waverly," Mallory said quietly.
"I .. didn't mean for them to fight."
"I think you did," he said. "Is it true you went out with Antonio last night?"
"Who told you that?"
"Antonio. He's bragging to all his friends. You're really going to hurt Dante's feelings."
Waverly pouted. "It was just a little date."
"I think you just like the attention," Mallory said, "and you don't seem to care who you hurt. You're acting just like Lucy, only at least she's honest about it."
"That's a really mean thing to say, Mallory."
"I'm your best friend. If I don't say it, who will?"
"Some best friend."
"Well, keep this up and I may change my mind," he said.
"Mallory, walk me home," Morgan said. "This is way too Beverly Hills 90210 for me."
Mallory put his arm around his girlfriend. "See you, Waverly. Try to be good, OK?" He touched her under her chin and walked off with Morgan.
Waverly watched them go, heartbroken. All she had ever wanted was for Mallory to look at her the way he looked at Morgan.
And now her life was one big mess.
Xanthe on Her Own
Xanthe had graduated from college and bought the house next door to Xena and Porter. It was basically a shell with working plumbing and electricity, up to the individual where to put the rooms. So far she had a bathroom, a bedroom and a huge open room for everything else. Each house was a different color. Xanthe's was the blue one.
She saw Walter on the weekends and on her days off, and the rest of the time she worked as a tarot card reader. Porter was also in the "biz" and she saw him occasionally. He was a police psychic, though he scoffed at the very notion of there being such a thing as psychic. "It's just simple deduction," he said.
"And 200 years of learning about human nature," Xena chimed in.
"Well, naturally," he said.
Xanthe found him extremely attractive, but who wouldn't? He looked like a movie star, was in incredible physical shape and knew how to dress besides. She'd have to be dead not to feel something for him. But her heart belonged to Walter and Porter was definitely in love with her sister so she kept her feelings to herself. Besides, Walter was definitely the man for her. He had a slow sexy smile that turned her knees to jelly and a way of touching her that melted her on the spot. Just thinking about him could make her forget what she was doing, and she had the scorched pots and pans to prove it.
She wore his ring. They were to be married when he graduated, but since he'd decided to get a graduate degree that wouldn't be for a while yet, which suited Xanthe just fine. She couldn't imagine life without him but the thought of marriage still scared her a little.
As for being psychic, Xanthe sometimes had premonitions that she decided not to tell Porter about. Nothing major, just little flashes that came true soon after, like the time she stopped the little boy from running into the waitress who hadn't left the kitchen yet.
Zaid had graduated too and was living across from a woman and her niece or daughter, he wasn't sure which, that he couldn't stand. For one thing they neglected their garden and their house was becoming an eyesore. For another the woman kept coming on to him and the girl played music loudly all night while the older woman was at work.
As a result, he and Xanthe went to the movies or spent time at her house on a regular basis, continuing the friendship they'd had in college.
All in all, Xanthe's life was pretty good.
She saw Walter on the weekends and on her days off, and the rest of the time she worked as a tarot card reader. Porter was also in the "biz" and she saw him occasionally. He was a police psychic, though he scoffed at the very notion of there being such a thing as psychic. "It's just simple deduction," he said.
"And 200 years of learning about human nature," Xena chimed in.
"Well, naturally," he said.
Xanthe found him extremely attractive, but who wouldn't? He looked like a movie star, was in incredible physical shape and knew how to dress besides. She'd have to be dead not to feel something for him. But her heart belonged to Walter and Porter was definitely in love with her sister so she kept her feelings to herself. Besides, Walter was definitely the man for her. He had a slow sexy smile that turned her knees to jelly and a way of touching her that melted her on the spot. Just thinking about him could make her forget what she was doing, and she had the scorched pots and pans to prove it.
She wore his ring. They were to be married when he graduated, but since he'd decided to get a graduate degree that wouldn't be for a while yet, which suited Xanthe just fine. She couldn't imagine life without him but the thought of marriage still scared her a little.
As for being psychic, Xanthe sometimes had premonitions that she decided not to tell Porter about. Nothing major, just little flashes that came true soon after, like the time she stopped the little boy from running into the waitress who hadn't left the kitchen yet.
Zaid had graduated too and was living across from a woman and her niece or daughter, he wasn't sure which, that he couldn't stand. For one thing they neglected their garden and their house was becoming an eyesore. For another the woman kept coming on to him and the girl played music loudly all night while the older woman was at work.
As a result, he and Xanthe went to the movies or spent time at her house on a regular basis, continuing the friendship they'd had in college.
All in all, Xanthe's life was pretty good.
Teenage Love
The only bad thing about getting into private school was that Mallory wouldn't see Morgan every day anymore. He'd heard she was trying to get into the same school, and he hoped it was true.
He wasn't sure if she noticed him. He had a hard time talking to girls. Waverly was practically his sister, so she didn't really count. But Morgan ... Morgan was brave and beautiful and fun and something about her smile made him feel like a different person.
All the girls at school acted weird around him. Waverly had explained it was because they thought he was cute, and cool.
He wasn't cool. He was shy. He wanted to make friends but it was hard for him to open his mouth and say something. If never saying anything was cool, then he was the coolest kid ever.
Morgan was waiting for him on his front steps when he got home from school. At first he thought he was imagining it. Play it cool, Mal. He sat down next to her. "Hey."
"Hey, yourself." She nudged him with her body by way of greeting. "Heard you got into private school. You still gonna talk to me?"
He smiled. "Yeah."
She looked at her fingernails like they were really interesting as she said, "Mal, you want to go out with me sometime?"
His heart skipped a beat. She liked him too?
"Say something," she said. She actually sounded nervous.
"Yeah," his voice squeaked a little. Darn puberty. "I mean, yeah, of course I do."
She sighed with relief. "I thought I was gonna crash and burn."
Morgan? Afraid of something? This was a first. "Nah."
"I like you, Mallory. You really have a way of putting things," she teased.
He couldn't think of anything to say so he took her hand. She squeezed his in return.
"I have to go," she said, standing up. "My mom will expect me at home. I'll call you tonight, OK?"
"OK," Mallory said, standing up too. "Bye." He turned and went inside.
He couldn't wipe the smile off his face for the rest of the afternoon. Every time he thought about her it just made him smile more.
Morgan Delacroix liked him.
Waverly to the Rescue
"Daddy, stop it!" Waverly jumped off the school bus and tried to pull her father off of Jack. "Stop hurting him."
Ashley stood up, breathing hard. "You said don't fight with your mom. You never said anything about him."
"Leave him alone! You won. Go inside."
Ashley growled, but turned to go inside.
Jack staggered to his feet. Rescued by a kid. Could this day get any more humiliating? He started to limp home.
"You OK, Mister?"
He turned to see Pixie girl, looking at him with concern on her face.
"I'm sorry about my dad. He's kind of a hothead. Maybe you should just not come over any more."
"Good idea, kid. I'm fine. Thanks for the rescue. I guess I owe you."
"Just stop hitting on my mom."
"Not a problem. See ya round. Or not." What he needed now was a long hot bath and a bottle of whiskey.
Women were nothing but trouble.
Ashley stood up, breathing hard. "You said don't fight with your mom. You never said anything about him."
"Leave him alone! You won. Go inside."
Ashley growled, but turned to go inside.
Jack staggered to his feet. Rescued by a kid. Could this day get any more humiliating? He started to limp home.
"You OK, Mister?"
He turned to see Pixie girl, looking at him with concern on her face.
"I'm sorry about my dad. He's kind of a hothead. Maybe you should just not come over any more."
"Good idea, kid. I'm fine. Thanks for the rescue. I guess I owe you."
"Just stop hitting on my mom."
"Not a problem. See ya round. Or not." What he needed now was a long hot bath and a bottle of whiskey.
Women were nothing but trouble.
Bad Decision
Jack just couldn't seem to catch a break. He'd met this woman named Heather at the grocery store and though she wasn't really his type he didn't turn away when she struck up a conversation.
Hey, at least she was close to his own age.
When she invited him to her house for a party she'd neglected to mention it was for her kid, a cute pixie of a teenager named Waverly. But when you got to a certain age you came to expect that people would have baggage: ex husbands, kids, goldfish.
Heather flirted with him so he flirted back until he noticed how much it bothered the kid. Then he'd found an excuse to leave.
Today Heather had called saying the kid was at school and did he want to come over. She had a new love tub and she was home alone, wink wink nudge nudge.
It had been a while, so Jack said sure what the heck.
The pickup truck in the driveway was still warm, the engine turning over, when he got there, and his senses were suddenly alert. Someone had just come home. Jack turned to leave.
"You must be Jack," said a voice behind him.
Jack turned around. Apparently Heather had neglected to mention something else. Her boyfriend would have been menacing without the tattoos. With them he was downright scary. "Uh, no, you've got the wrong--"
Scary tattoo guy didn't even let him finish.
Oh, great, Jack thought as he went down in a cloud of dust, here we go again.
Hey, at least she was close to his own age.
When she invited him to her house for a party she'd neglected to mention it was for her kid, a cute pixie of a teenager named Waverly. But when you got to a certain age you came to expect that people would have baggage: ex husbands, kids, goldfish.
Heather flirted with him so he flirted back until he noticed how much it bothered the kid. Then he'd found an excuse to leave.
Today Heather had called saying the kid was at school and did he want to come over. She had a new love tub and she was home alone, wink wink nudge nudge.
It had been a while, so Jack said sure what the heck.
The pickup truck in the driveway was still warm, the engine turning over, when he got there, and his senses were suddenly alert. Someone had just come home. Jack turned to leave.
"You must be Jack," said a voice behind him.
Jack turned around. Apparently Heather had neglected to mention something else. Her boyfriend would have been menacing without the tattoos. With them he was downright scary. "Uh, no, you've got the wrong--"
Scary tattoo guy didn't even let him finish.
Oh, great, Jack thought as he went down in a cloud of dust, here we go again.
Waverly Comes Clean
"Any particular reason you and your mother aren't speaking lately?" Ashley asked Waverly as they sat down to dinner. Heather had just come home from work and was upstairs taking a shower. Rather than move they'd recently added an entire second floor to Ashley's original home.
"We speak," Waverly said, not meeting his eyes.
"Uh huh. Waverly, I may not be the smartest guy alive but I'm not a complete idiot. Things haven't been right between you two since your birthday party. What gives?"
"I'd ... rather not say."
"Let me guess," Ashley said, sighing heavily, "the 'friend' your mom invited to your party was more than just a friend."
Waverly stared at her hamburger, her cheeks turning red.
"Waverly, you're worse at keeping a secret than anyone I've ever met," Ashley said. "You might as well tell me the whole thing."
Waverly looked at him, lip trembling. "I don't want you and Mom to fight."
"I'm afraid that's unavoidable, Sweet Cakes, but I'll try to keep that in mind. Spill."
Heather came downstairs a few minutes later, toweling her hair, and stopped dead when she saw their two accusatory faces staring at her. "What?"
"Heather," Ashley asked, "who's Jack?"
"We speak," Waverly said, not meeting his eyes.
"Uh huh. Waverly, I may not be the smartest guy alive but I'm not a complete idiot. Things haven't been right between you two since your birthday party. What gives?"
"I'd ... rather not say."
"Let me guess," Ashley said, sighing heavily, "the 'friend' your mom invited to your party was more than just a friend."
Waverly stared at her hamburger, her cheeks turning red.
"Waverly, you're worse at keeping a secret than anyone I've ever met," Ashley said. "You might as well tell me the whole thing."
Waverly looked at him, lip trembling. "I don't want you and Mom to fight."
"I'm afraid that's unavoidable, Sweet Cakes, but I'll try to keep that in mind. Spill."
Heather came downstairs a few minutes later, toweling her hair, and stopped dead when she saw their two accusatory faces staring at her. "What?"
"Heather," Ashley asked, "who's Jack?"
"Um, Xena, why are you still in your pajamas?" Mallory asked. It was four o'clock on a Wednesday.
"Because I feel awful today," she said, a bit snappishly. "Sorry, Mal, I'm just feeling really preggers today."
"The headmaster's going to be here in an hour."
"That's TONIGHT?!!"
"Uh, yeah, I left a note on the fridge. You said you'd cook. All Dad knows how to make is hamburgers."
"Hey," Porter said, coming into the bedroom, "vampires don't eat much. Didn't have much incentive to learn."
"Oh, Mallory, I'm sorry, I completely forgot. Give me five minutes," Xena said.
"How can I help?" Porter asked.
"Fix that goddamned bathroom sink. It's been gushing all day," Xena said.
Both men stared at her.
She blushed. "I'm sorry,
guys, I'm just not myself lately."
Porter kissed her. "You sure you're up for this? We can call for takeout."
"No," she said, "a promise is a promise. You fix the sink, I'll get decent and make that stuffed shirt the best pork chops he's ever had. Mallory, put on a clean shirt. That one's wrinkled."
"Yes, Mom," he said, kissing her cheek before he left the room.
She touched her face where he'd kissed her and smiled.
"Makes it all worth it, doesn't it?" Porter asked, giving her a kiss as well. "I'll go fix that sink now."
Xena pulled on a dress and ran a brush through her hair.
"Oh, and hon?" Porter said, turning back.
"Yes?"
"Try not to call him a stuffed shirt to his face."
Xena giggled. "Good advice."
"Because I feel awful today," she said, a bit snappishly. "Sorry, Mal, I'm just feeling really preggers today."
"The headmaster's going to be here in an hour."
"That's TONIGHT?!!"
"Uh, yeah, I left a note on the fridge. You said you'd cook. All Dad knows how to make is hamburgers."
"Hey," Porter said, coming into the bedroom, "vampires don't eat much. Didn't have much incentive to learn."
"Oh, Mallory, I'm sorry, I completely forgot. Give me five minutes," Xena said.
"How can I help?" Porter asked.
"Fix that goddamned bathroom sink. It's been gushing all day," Xena said.
Both men stared at her.
She blushed. "I'm sorry,
guys, I'm just not myself lately."Porter kissed her. "You sure you're up for this? We can call for takeout."
"No," she said, "a promise is a promise. You fix the sink, I'll get decent and make that stuffed shirt the best pork chops he's ever had. Mallory, put on a clean shirt. That one's wrinkled."
"Yes, Mom," he said, kissing her cheek before he left the room.
She touched her face where he'd kissed her and smiled.
"Makes it all worth it, doesn't it?" Porter asked, giving her a kiss as well. "I'll go fix that sink now."
Xena pulled on a dress and ran a brush through her hair.
"Oh, and hon?" Porter said, turning back.
"Yes?"
"Try not to call him a stuffed shirt to his face."
Xena giggled. "Good advice."
Lunch With Ariel
"I hate being pregnant," Xena sniffled over lunch with Ariel a few weeks later. "Everything hurts and I throw up all the time and I just want to sleep. I feel like I've got this little alien invader in my belly." She giggled. "I guess that makes me the mother ship."
"How does Porter feel about it?"
Xena's lip trembled. "He offered to, you know, not have it but he might as well have offered to rip his own heart out and hand it to me on a platter. He wants this baby. He'll be a great father to it."
"I know he will. I've seen him with Mallory."
"I'm just terrified I'll be a horrible mother," Xena blurted out.
"Xena, you won't be a horrible mother. Trust me," Ariel smiled and patted her hand.
"How can you possibly know that?"
"Honey, you're a warm and wonderful person who doesn't have it in her to be rotten to a spider, let alone a baby. You'll be a great mother."
"See, now you're making me cry," Xena said, huge tears running down her face.
"It's the hormones."
"Stupid hormones. Stupid pregnant belly. Stupid hot tub."
"Feel better?"
"Yeah, I guess so."
"Have a tissue."
"How does Porter feel about it?"
Xena's lip trembled. "He offered to, you know, not have it but he might as well have offered to rip his own heart out and hand it to me on a platter. He wants this baby. He'll be a great father to it."
"I know he will. I've seen him with Mallory."
"I'm just terrified I'll be a horrible mother," Xena blurted out.
"Xena, you won't be a horrible mother. Trust me," Ariel smiled and patted her hand.
"How can you possibly know that?"
"Honey, you're a warm and wonderful person who doesn't have it in her to be rotten to a spider, let alone a baby. You'll be a great mother."
"See, now you're making me cry," Xena said, huge tears running down her face.
"It's the hormones."
"Stupid hormones. Stupid pregnant belly. Stupid hot tub."
"Feel better?"
"Yeah, I guess so."
"Have a tissue."
Twelve Little Sticks Can't Be Wrong
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!!!!
Xena stared at the stick in her hand in horror. It said the same thing as the dozen others littering her bathroom counter. This couldn't be happening. She had a movie to wrap, publicity to do, she hadn't wanted this.
But twelve little sticks couldn't be wrong.
She was going to be a mother again.
This time, with stretch marks.
Xena stared at the stick in her hand in horror. It said the same thing as the dozen others littering her bathroom counter. This couldn't be happening. She had a movie to wrap, publicity to do, she hadn't wanted this.
But twelve little sticks couldn't be wrong.
She was going to be a mother again.
This time, with stretch marks.
Her Inner Temptress
When Apollo got home from work that night Skye met him at the door. "Maxie's out on a date," she said. "I have something to show you." She put her hands over his eyes.
"You want to show me your hands?"
"Ha ha, Apollo. No, I got us something." She walked him to the backyard. "No peeking. OK, now."
It was a hot tub, but it was pink, with flowers all over it. It smelled nice and had a lot of candles.
"Uh, it's pretty."
"I took a class," she said, removing her robe. Underneath she wore a very sexy bikini. "It's called, unleashing your inner temptress." She wrapped her arms around him and kissed him.
"I like the sound of that," Apollo said, holding her and feeling things he hadn't felt for her in a long time. Whatever she'd changed, it was working.
"Marriage doesn't have to be a bore," she said. "I figured I could have an affair with someone new, or have more fun with the guy I've already got. I chose you. What d'you say, Apollo? Wanna try out the love tub?"
"You want to show me your hands?"
"Ha ha, Apollo. No, I got us something." She walked him to the backyard. "No peeking. OK, now."
It was a hot tub, but it was pink, with flowers all over it. It smelled nice and had a lot of candles."Uh, it's pretty."
"I took a class," she said, removing her robe. Underneath she wore a very sexy bikini. "It's called, unleashing your inner temptress." She wrapped her arms around him and kissed him.
"I like the sound of that," Apollo said, holding her and feeling things he hadn't felt for her in a long time. Whatever she'd changed, it was working.
"Marriage doesn't have to be a bore," she said. "I figured I could have an affair with someone new, or have more fun with the guy I've already got. I chose you. What d'you say, Apollo? Wanna try out the love tub?"
Mallory and Waverly
"Hey, Waverly," Mallory said, hurrying to catch her up, "walk you home?"
"Sure, Mal, that would be great," she said with a halfhearted smile.
"Hey, what's wrong?"
"Oh, nothing. My mom's just cheating on my dad and I don't know what to do."
"I didn't realize they were together now."
"Oh, they're not, not really, but there's this unspoken understanding, you know. I mean, they're all over each other all the time. Dad would be heartbroken if he knew."
"Well, don't tell him." Mallory put his hands in his pockets and walked beside her.
Waverly kicked a stone down the street. "Why not? He has a right to know, doesn't he?"
"Trust me, you don't want to live with two adults who hate each other. I've been there. That's why I went to live with my dad."
"I guess you're right."
"It's not surprising, anyway, this is Heather we're talking about."
"Hey now, she is my mom," Waverly said.
"C'mon, Wave, you know what's she's like."
Waverly sighed. "Yeah, I guess I do."
Mallory nudged her with his shoulder. "Race you to the ice cream parlor. Loser buys." He took off running.
"Hey, cheating!" She yelled, tearing after him. "You didn't say go."
"Sure, Mal, that would be great," she said with a halfhearted smile.
"Hey, what's wrong?"
"Oh, nothing. My mom's just cheating on my dad and I don't know what to do."
"I didn't realize they were together now."
"Oh, they're not, not really, but there's this unspoken understanding, you know. I mean, they're all over each other all the time. Dad would be heartbroken if he knew."
"Well, don't tell him." Mallory put his hands in his pockets and walked beside her.
Waverly kicked a stone down the street. "Why not? He has a right to know, doesn't he?"
"Trust me, you don't want to live with two adults who hate each other. I've been there. That's why I went to live with my dad."
"I guess you're right."
"It's not surprising, anyway, this is Heather we're talking about."
"Hey now, she is my mom," Waverly said.
"C'mon, Wave, you know what's she's like."
Waverly sighed. "Yeah, I guess I do."
Mallory nudged her with his shoulder. "Race you to the ice cream parlor. Loser buys." He took off running.
"Hey, cheating!" She yelled, tearing after him. "You didn't say go."
Trouble
Becoming a teenager did not improve Antonio. Xander had worried about the day his youngest son would be able to drive a car. Bad enough that he was called to the principal's office on a daily basis; now he'd be getting calls from Orlando's police friends downtown. He worried about his son constantly, fearing he was heading for trouble.
Orlando had a lot of influence with the boy, more than Xander did, but he admitted privately to his husband that he thought Antonio just had a mean streak. "All we can do is love him and try to steer him right," Orlando said, "but we've had no effect on him so far. I guess we'll just have to let go at some point and acknowledge that he is what he is."
"I just hope he doesn't wind up in prison, or dead," Xander said. "He's just so pigheaded."
And now Antonio and Carlo were fighting over a girl named Lucy. Their fights had gotten more serious since Antonio got big enough to fight back. Carlo had been pulling his punches, but now that they were both teenagers all bets were off. Orlando had had to separate them this afternoon. The two men had come home to a houseful of rowdy teenagers and their two youngest sons brawling in the kitchen.
The boys still shared a room, and all three wanted their own. Xander decided it was time to acknowledge that Carlo and Antonio were not destined to be best friends. Antonio could have the study room, his and Alec's room once upon a time, and the two older boys could share, since they got along.
For now. Xander had seen the way Dante watched Lucy as she left their house that afternoon.
That girl was trouble.
Orlando had a lot of influence with the boy, more than Xander did, but he admitted privately to his husband that he thought Antonio just had a mean streak. "All we can do is love him and try to steer him right," Orlando said, "but we've had no effect on him so far. I guess we'll just have to let go at some point and acknowledge that he is what he is."
"I just hope he doesn't wind up in prison, or dead," Xander said. "He's just so pigheaded."
And now Antonio and Carlo were fighting over a girl named Lucy. Their fights had gotten more serious since Antonio got big enough to fight back. Carlo had been pulling his punches, but now that they were both teenagers all bets were off. Orlando had had to separate them this afternoon. The two men had come home to a houseful of rowdy teenagers and their two youngest sons brawling in the kitchen.
The boys still shared a room, and all three wanted their own. Xander decided it was time to acknowledge that Carlo and Antonio were not destined to be best friends. Antonio could have the study room, his and Alec's room once upon a time, and the two older boys could share, since they got along.
For now. Xander had seen the way Dante watched Lucy as she left their house that afternoon.
That girl was trouble.
We Have to Stop Meeting Like This
"Hey, Apollo," Porter said, sitting down next to him. "Seems you and I are destined to meet in bars."
"And I hardly ever drink," Apollo said. "Cheers."
Porter ordered a beer and turned to his friend. "So, what brings you here on a weeknight?"
"Dunno, just wanted to get out of the house, I guess. Now that Max is a teenager the leash has been loosened a bit."
"Cheers to that," Porter said, "though now that they're teenagers we get a whole other set of problems to worry about."
"You have a scratch on your face," Apollo said.
Porter touched his cheek and smiled. "So I do."
Apollo rolled his eyes. "I take it you and Xena are getting along all right."
"More than all right," Porter agreed, grinning. "Marriage is great, so far."
"You're newlyweds. Give it time."
"Uh huh," Porter said, "things not so good with you and Skye?"
Apollo shrugged. "I can't complain. I'm still in love with her and I think she loves me. It's just ... " Apollo shook his head.
"It's just?" Porter said.
"No sparks. None. We're a pleasant, happy, boring couple. I hate myself for saying this, but I felt a lot more sparks when she was freaky vampire girl. Now that's she's not, she's become, I don't know, conventional, I guess. Not that there's anything wrong with that."
"But she's happier this way?"
"I guess. Her career has finally taken off, which is nice. I was starting to think she had no ambition. She's not really into being a mom. I did most of the parenting stuff with Max. They don't have a great relationship."
"That's too bad."
"Anyway, I feel like a louse for even complaining. We have a stable marriage, the sex is good, and she can be a lot of fun. I'm just a little bored, I guess. Be careful what you wish for, huh? I always said I didn't want to have the passionate rollercoaster my parents have, and guess what, I don't. Looks like you do, though," he said, indicating the scratch. "Good on you, Mate."
Porter smiled. "It's weird, too, because I always thought I wanted her sister."
"So, you happy you didn't get what you wished for in that case?"
"Very. Ariel and I are good friends, but Xena ... " Porter finished his beer. "Gotta get home, my friend. Sorry to hear about your troubles." He stood up. "You need to talk, I'm here."
"Just not right now," Apollo said, grinning. "Don't worry, I'm fine. Thanks for letting me vent."
"Anytime." Porter threw some money on the bar. "Later."
"And I hardly ever drink," Apollo said. "Cheers."
Porter ordered a beer and turned to his friend. "So, what brings you here on a weeknight?"
"Dunno, just wanted to get out of the house, I guess. Now that Max is a teenager the leash has been loosened a bit."
"Cheers to that," Porter said, "though now that they're teenagers we get a whole other set of problems to worry about."
"You have a scratch on your face," Apollo said.
Porter touched his cheek and smiled. "So I do."
Apollo rolled his eyes. "I take it you and Xena are getting along all right."
"More than all right," Porter agreed, grinning. "Marriage is great, so far."
"You're newlyweds. Give it time."
"Uh huh," Porter said, "things not so good with you and Skye?"
Apollo shrugged. "I can't complain. I'm still in love with her and I think she loves me. It's just ... " Apollo shook his head.
"It's just?" Porter said.
"No sparks. None. We're a pleasant, happy, boring couple. I hate myself for saying this, but I felt a lot more sparks when she was freaky vampire girl. Now that's she's not, she's become, I don't know, conventional, I guess. Not that there's anything wrong with that."
"But she's happier this way?"
"I guess. Her career has finally taken off, which is nice. I was starting to think she had no ambition. She's not really into being a mom. I did most of the parenting stuff with Max. They don't have a great relationship."
"That's too bad."
"Anyway, I feel like a louse for even complaining. We have a stable marriage, the sex is good, and she can be a lot of fun. I'm just a little bored, I guess. Be careful what you wish for, huh? I always said I didn't want to have the passionate rollercoaster my parents have, and guess what, I don't. Looks like you do, though," he said, indicating the scratch. "Good on you, Mate."
Porter smiled. "It's weird, too, because I always thought I wanted her sister."
"So, you happy you didn't get what you wished for in that case?"
"Very. Ariel and I are good friends, but Xena ... " Porter finished his beer. "Gotta get home, my friend. Sorry to hear about your troubles." He stood up. "You need to talk, I'm here."
"Just not right now," Apollo said, grinning. "Don't worry, I'm fine. Thanks for letting me vent."
"Anytime." Porter threw some money on the bar. "Later."
Spike Pays Tribute
"You OK, Spike? You seem kind of down." London sat next to him and rubbed his shoulders.
Spike shrugged. "Just missing your old man, is all. He was right decent to me, and he didn't have to be. I mean, I turned his favorite daughter into a vampire."
"I don't know about favorite ... "
"You were daddy's little girl, don't deny it. I saw the family pictures at the party."
London sighed and leaned against him. "I miss him, too. It was nice of him to leave us all that money."
"I know. I thought we should get something special with it. You know, proper tribute."
"Good idea."
Spike grinned. "Glad you agree, cuz I already did it."
"Spike, what did you do ... "
"Come see." He put his hands over her eyes and walked her across the yard. "Ready?" He took his hands away.
There, in the driveway, was a brand new Ducati.
"So very practical, with our house falling down around our ears," she said, but relented when she saw his disappointed face. "Spike, I'm teasing." She grinned at him slyly. "Take me for a spin on our new bike?"
He hopped on and she straddled the seat behind him, holding him tight as they drove off into the night, laughing like a couple of teenagers.
Spike shrugged. "Just missing your old man, is all. He was right decent to me, and he didn't have to be. I mean, I turned his favorite daughter into a vampire."
"I don't know about favorite ... "
"You were daddy's little girl, don't deny it. I saw the family pictures at the party."
London sighed and leaned against him. "I miss him, too. It was nice of him to leave us all that money."
"I know. I thought we should get something special with it. You know, proper tribute."
"Good idea."
Spike grinned. "Glad you agree, cuz I already did it."
"Spike, what did you do ... "
"Come see." He put his hands over her eyes and walked her across the yard. "Ready?" He took his hands away.
There, in the driveway, was a brand new Ducati.
"So very practical, with our house falling down around our ears," she said, but relented when she saw his disappointed face. "Spike, I'm teasing." She grinned at him slyly. "Take me for a spin on our new bike?"
He hopped on and she straddled the seat behind him, holding him tight as they drove off into the night, laughing like a couple of teenagers.
Red
"I didn't realize it belonged to you," the redheaded girl said the next night, standing at Jack's front door. She handed him the gaming system. "The TV's in the car."
He handed it back. "Keep it, Red. Teach me not to have a burglar alarm."
She looked at him suspiciously. "What's the catch?"
"No catch."
"There's always a catch."
"Not this time."
"Huh." She looked at him, looked at the gaming system, and shrugged. "OK, your loss."
"Actually not," he said. "I bought a better one."
"Hah!" She grinned. "I knew there was a catch." She put the gaming system back in the car and turned to look at him. "Can I see it?"
"Sorry, but no."
"Why not?"
"I can't have you hanging around my house unchaperoned. People might get the wrong idea."
"People, huh." She cocked her head at him, hand on her hip. "You got people watching you, Jack?"
He shook his head. "You're trouble, you know that, Red?"
"Lucy."
"Hmmm?"
"My name's Lucy, not Red. And you know you can take medication for that, right?"
"For what?"
"Paranoia."
"Funny. You're a funny girl. Go home now."
Lucy sighed. "You sure I can't just hang out here?"
"Positive. Stop by again in five years."
She grinned. "I just may do that, Jack." She hopped in the car and drove off.
He went inside to have a drink.
He handed it back. "Keep it, Red. Teach me not to have a burglar alarm."
She looked at him suspiciously. "What's the catch?"
"No catch.""There's always a catch."
"Not this time."
"Huh." She looked at him, looked at the gaming system, and shrugged. "OK, your loss."
"Actually not," he said. "I bought a better one."
"Hah!" She grinned. "I knew there was a catch." She put the gaming system back in the car and turned to look at him. "Can I see it?"
"Sorry, but no."
"Why not?"
"I can't have you hanging around my house unchaperoned. People might get the wrong idea."
"People, huh." She cocked her head at him, hand on her hip. "You got people watching you, Jack?"
He shook his head. "You're trouble, you know that, Red?"
"Lucy."
"Hmmm?"
"My name's Lucy, not Red. And you know you can take medication for that, right?"
"For what?"
"Paranoia."
"Funny. You're a funny girl. Go home now."
Lucy sighed. "You sure I can't just hang out here?"
"Positive. Stop by again in five years."
She grinned. "I just may do that, Jack." She hopped in the car and drove off.
He went inside to have a drink.
Instant Motherhood
“This is your room, Mallory,” Xena said, showing him the front bedroom upstairs. Porter had gone a little overboard, buying his son the latest toys, and the room was a bit crowded.
Mallory had been very quiet since he arrived. Tiffany had dropped him off, given him an emotional hug, and left without another word. Xena had felt bad for her, but she knew Tiffany wouldn’t appreciate her sympathy.
Now she sat down on Mallory’s new bed and patted the spot next to her. “Come sit down,” she said. He sat next to her and she put her arm around him. “You OK, honey?”
“Are you two going to fight all the time?” he asked, quietly.
“No, honey. I can't promise we'll never have a disagreement, but Porter and I don’t fight much.” Anymore, she added silently. “And if we do have an argument we make up pretty quickly.”
“Mom and Brittney were always yelling at each other,” he said, “and during the day it was so boring, with no one to talk to. I miss Waverly.”
“Maybe we can invite her over to play,” Xena suggested. “And you’ve got a cousin, Piper, too.”
“A cousin?”
Xena smiled. “Yes. Your aunt married my brother and they have two little girls. Olivia’s a baby, but Piper’s old enough for you to play with.”
“That would be nice.” Mallory looked up at her. “Are you my mom now?”
“I am if you want me to be, honey.”
“Is it OK to have two moms?”
“Yes, Mallory, I think that’s perfectly OK.”
Wow. Instant motherhood, she realized with a jolt. She’d been too busy with all the preparations to really think about it. She gave her stepson a hug and he snuggled into her.
Motherhood wasn’t so bad, she decided.
And hey, no stretch marks.
Mallory had been very quiet since he arrived. Tiffany had dropped him off, given him an emotional hug, and left without another word. Xena had felt bad for her, but she knew Tiffany wouldn’t appreciate her sympathy.
Now she sat down on Mallory’s new bed and patted the spot next to her. “Come sit down,” she said. He sat next to her and she put her arm around him. “You OK, honey?”
“Are you two going to fight all the time?” he asked, quietly.
“No, honey. I can't promise we'll never have a disagreement, but Porter and I don’t fight much.” Anymore, she added silently. “And if we do have an argument we make up pretty quickly.”
“Mom and Brittney were always yelling at each other,” he said, “and during the day it was so boring, with no one to talk to. I miss Waverly.”
“Maybe we can invite her over to play,” Xena suggested. “And you’ve got a cousin, Piper, too.”
“A cousin?”
Xena smiled. “Yes. Your aunt married my brother and they have two little girls. Olivia’s a baby, but Piper’s old enough for you to play with.”
“That would be nice.” Mallory looked up at her. “Are you my mom now?”
“I am if you want me to be, honey.”
“Is it OK to have two moms?”
“Yes, Mallory, I think that’s perfectly OK.”
Wow. Instant motherhood, she realized with a jolt. She’d been too busy with all the preparations to really think about it. She gave her stepson a hug and he snuggled into her.
Motherhood wasn’t so bad, she decided.
And hey, no stretch marks.
Proving Him Wrong
Xena was back on top, right where Porter had predicted she would be. She had blown Broadway away with her latest show, playing a femme fatale, and her agent had called today to tell her she’d been offered the lead in a movie. With the money she would make they could afford to decorate their place and buy some decent furniture.
“Honey, I’m home,” she called.
Porter came downstairs. “Hey,” he said, giving her a kiss. “Good day?”
“I got the lead in a movie! If I like the script, that is,” she said, throwing her arms around him.
He spun her around. “That’s great. I got promoted today too. It looks like our ship has finally come in.”
“I can’t wait to buy a new sofa,” she said.
“Come on in and sit down,” he said, “I have something else to tell you.”
They sat down on their ugly old sofa. She removed her shoes and wiggled her toes. “What is it?”
“Mallory called today. He wants to come live with us. I told him he could. I’m sorry I didn’t discuss it with you first.”
“Of course you had to say yes. You can’t say no to a child about something like that.”
“I knew you’d understand.” Porter seemed relieved.
“I love him too, Porter,” she said.
He looked at her thoughtfully for a long moment. “I want to say something to you,” he said finally.
“Which is?” she said, teasingly, after he didn’t speak for a while.
“I never thought I’d get to have what other people have,” he said. “I never thought I’d have a family of my own. I never thought I’d get to be happy.” His voice broke a little on the last word. “Thank you for proving me wrong.”
“Oh, Porter.” She put her arms around him and held him.
“Honey, I’m home,” she called.
Porter came downstairs. “Hey,” he said, giving her a kiss. “Good day?”
“I got the lead in a movie! If I like the script, that is,” she said, throwing her arms around him.
He spun her around. “That’s great. I got promoted today too. It looks like our ship has finally come in.”
“I can’t wait to buy a new sofa,” she said.
“Come on in and sit down,” he said, “I have something else to tell you.”
They sat down on their ugly old sofa. She removed her shoes and wiggled her toes. “What is it?”
“Mallory called today. He wants to come live with us. I told him he could. I’m sorry I didn’t discuss it with you first.”
“Of course you had to say yes. You can’t say no to a child about something like that.”
“I knew you’d understand.” Porter seemed relieved.
“I love him too, Porter,” she said.
He looked at her thoughtfully for a long moment. “I want to say something to you,” he said finally.
“Which is?” she said, teasingly, after he didn’t speak for a while.
“I never thought I’d get to have what other people have,” he said. “I never thought I’d have a family of my own. I never thought I’d get to be happy.” His voice broke a little on the last word. “Thank you for proving me wrong.”
“Oh, Porter.” She put her arms around him and held him.
Lola and Jack Have Lunch
“Thank you for agreeing to meet me for lunch, Jack,” Lola said.
“I’m just surprised, is all,” Jack said. The understatement of the year. He thought the woman hated him.
“I know my family has been hard on you because of that article you wrote.”
“A little.” Jack rubbed his jaw where Xena had hit him.
“But I’m glad you wrote it.”
He stared at her. “You are?”
“You gave Tyson and me the chance to come clean with each other. If you hadn’t, I might have never confronted Tyson about his affair and always wondered ...” she let her voice trail off.
Jack nodded. “Makes sense to me.” He held up his glass. “To Tyson.”
“To Tyson,” Lola said, giving him a watery smile.
“So why take me to lunch? Why not a phone call?”
Lola shrugged. “How else am I going to get a handsome man to go to lunch with me?”
“Lola,” Jack said, “you’re one heck of a woman, and a knockout to boot. You could get any guy in this town if you just snapped your fingers.” He meant it, too. Who cared if she was old enough to be his grandmother. There was something about her that made him forget that.
Lola smiled. “You’re all right, Jack.”
“I’m just surprised, is all,” Jack said. The understatement of the year. He thought the woman hated him.
“I know my family has been hard on you because of that article you wrote.”
“A little.” Jack rubbed his jaw where Xena had hit him.
“But I’m glad you wrote it.”
He stared at her. “You are?”
“You gave Tyson and me the chance to come clean with each other. If you hadn’t, I might have never confronted Tyson about his affair and always wondered ...” she let her voice trail off.
Jack nodded. “Makes sense to me.” He held up his glass. “To Tyson.”
“To Tyson,” Lola said, giving him a watery smile.
“So why take me to lunch? Why not a phone call?”
Lola shrugged. “How else am I going to get a handsome man to go to lunch with me?”
“Lola,” Jack said, “you’re one heck of a woman, and a knockout to boot. You could get any guy in this town if you just snapped your fingers.” He meant it, too. Who cared if she was old enough to be his grandmother. There was something about her that made him forget that.
Lola smiled. “You’re all right, Jack.”
Mallory's Home Life
His mom and Brittney were yelling at each other again. Mallory used to wait all day just for his mom to wake up but now he preferred it when she was sleeping. Brittney was calling his mom names and they were slapping each other.
He ran to his room and put his head under his pillow.
He ran to his room and put his head under his pillow.
Her Type
The girl who opened the door the next day was a knockout. A face like an angel's with huge green eyes, long red curly hair, and an outfit that should have been illegal.
Also, she was all of fifteen years old.
Yikes, Jack. Talk about a jail sentence waiting to happen.
"Yeah?" She looked him over, bored.
"I'm here to see your ... mother?" No way. No way that woman had this child.
"She's not my mother, she's my aunt. Come on in."
Lolita backed away, snapping her gum and went to play a video game.
"Is she here?"
"Nah. She's at the store."
Jack stood in the doorway, watching her play on a television that suddenly looked very familiar.
"Hey, kid," he said. "Nice game system."
"Has she been bothering you?" asked a voice from behind him. The woman he'd met last night stood there, but she'd been shopping.
She'd dolled herself up. Nice red dress, red lipstick, and her hair was down.
It didn't help.
"Uh, no," he said. "I've just been watching her play videos." On my video system, he thought.
"Well, good," she said, standing in what she obviously thought was a provocative pose. "I'll just go get us a bottle of wine from the cellar." Jack felt the sudden need to bolt.
"You her new boyfriend?" the girl asked from her seat on the couch.
"Uh, no." Jack watched the woman go, nervously. "I don't even know her name. We just work together."
"It's Audrey, and you'd better watch out," the girl said. "You're breathing, you're her type."
"Thanks for the tip, kid." He looked at his watch. "I'd better go, anyway. See ya round. Oh, and kid?"
"Yeah?"
"Steal something else from me, you'll regret it."
She looked at him appraisingly, and nodded.
Also, she was all of fifteen years old.
Yikes, Jack. Talk about a jail sentence waiting to happen.
"Yeah?" She looked him over, bored.
"I'm here to see your ... mother?" No way. No way that woman had this child.
"She's not my mother, she's my aunt. Come on in."
Lolita backed away, snapping her gum and went to play a video game.
"Is she here?"
"Nah. She's at the store."
Jack stood in the doorway, watching her play on a television that suddenly looked very familiar.
"Hey, kid," he said. "Nice game system."
"Has she been bothering you?" asked a voice from behind him. The woman he'd met last night stood there, but she'd been shopping.
She'd dolled herself up. Nice red dress, red lipstick, and her hair was down.
It didn't help.
"Uh, no," he said. "I've just been watching her play videos." On my video system, he thought.
"Well, good," she said, standing in what she obviously thought was a provocative pose. "I'll just go get us a bottle of wine from the cellar." Jack felt the sudden need to bolt.
"You her new boyfriend?" the girl asked from her seat on the couch.
"Uh, no." Jack watched the woman go, nervously. "I don't even know her name. We just work together."
"It's Audrey, and you'd better watch out," the girl said. "You're breathing, you're her type."
"Thanks for the tip, kid." He looked at his watch. "I'd better go, anyway. See ya round. Oh, and kid?"
"Yeah?"
"Steal something else from me, you'll regret it."
She looked at him appraisingly, and nodded.
Working for Sheldon
Jack was there for the dropoff. The "dame" was harsh-looking all right, with a mouth that could pucker a lemon. Her tight hairdo and complete lack of makeup didn't help things any.
Hey, he thought, for all I know she's the nicest criminal this side of Jersey. He smiled at her and sauntered up.
"Got the goods?"
She fluttered her eyelashes at his smile and attempted one of her own. It made her look like she had stepped in something smelly. "Here you go, big boy."
Big boy? Oh oh. Note to self, watch the smiling. "Uh, thanks."
He turned to leave.
"Jack? It is Jack, right?"
He turned back. "Yeah?"
"Come to my house tomorrow." She wrote down the address. "I'll give you some tips about working for Sheldon."
"Sheldon?"
"Short guy, snappy dresser?"
"Oh, right. Thanks." He put the address in his pocket.
Maybe she wasn't so bad after all.
Hey, he thought, for all I know she's the nicest criminal this side of Jersey. He smiled at her and sauntered up.
"Got the goods?"
She fluttered her eyelashes at his smile and attempted one of her own. It made her look like she had stepped in something smelly. "Here you go, big boy."
Big boy? Oh oh. Note to self, watch the smiling. "Uh, thanks."
He turned to leave.
"Jack? It is Jack, right?"
He turned back. "Yeah?"
"Come to my house tomorrow." She wrote down the address. "I'll give you some tips about working for Sheldon."
"Sheldon?"
"Short guy, snappy dresser?"
"Oh, right. Thanks." He put the address in his pocket.
Maybe she wasn't so bad after all.
Jack's New Job
Jack Sawyer had a new job, if you could call it that. He'd sunk lower than the lowest he'd ever sunk this time, lower than a tabloid reporter ... well, maybe not lower than that.
He was a pickpocket who spent his afternoons ripping off the good people of Porta de Luca. And to his surprise, Jack at long last found his true calling. He had light fingers and could blend into any crowd. He'd never considered himself handsome; now it was an asset to be Mr. Ordinary. Grab and saunter, that was his style.
Today he'd been minding his own business when he was approached by a guy in a suit.
"Boss wants to speak to you."
"Whose boss?"
"Yours, now."
Jack shrugged and followed the guy, who looked like a television version of a CIA operative, to the back room of Bloody Mary, where a poker game was in progress.
"You Sawyer?" said a short unassuming-looking man in a suit.
"Yes."
"You're working for me now," said Shorty, handing him a piece of paper. "Meet my contact there tomorrow, midnight, don't be late. She'll be a harsh-looking dame in a schoomarm getup. Take what she gives you to the racetrack and give it to the guy at window number 3. You do good, I'll make you permanent."
"What if I don't want to?"
"You'll just have to find a way to get along without your teeth."
"Midnight it is." Jack left the bar with a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. And here he'd thought he was through working for the man.
When he got home someone had stolen his television and his brand-new gaming system.
How ironic.
The only clue the thief left was a long curly red hair.
He was a pickpocket who spent his afternoons ripping off the good people of Porta de Luca. And to his surprise, Jack at long last found his true calling. He had light fingers and could blend into any crowd. He'd never considered himself handsome; now it was an asset to be Mr. Ordinary. Grab and saunter, that was his style.
Today he'd been minding his own business when he was approached by a guy in a suit.
"Boss wants to speak to you."
"Whose boss?"
"Yours, now."
Jack shrugged and followed the guy, who looked like a television version of a CIA operative, to the back room of Bloody Mary, where a poker game was in progress.
"You Sawyer?" said a short unassuming-looking man in a suit.
"Yes."
"You're working for me now," said Shorty, handing him a piece of paper. "Meet my contact there tomorrow, midnight, don't be late. She'll be a harsh-looking dame in a schoomarm getup. Take what she gives you to the racetrack and give it to the guy at window number 3. You do good, I'll make you permanent."
"What if I don't want to?"
"You'll just have to find a way to get along without your teeth."
"Midnight it is." Jack left the bar with a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach. And here he'd thought he was through working for the man.
When he got home someone had stolen his television and his brand-new gaming system.
How ironic.
The only clue the thief left was a long curly red hair.
Xena's Wedding
"With this ring, Xena Nova, I make you my wife, for good times and bad, to care for and cherish for the rest of our days ... "
Porter put the ring on Xena's finger, and then it was her turn to repeat the vows, her voice choked with emotion. This was the most important moment of her entire life, a moment she'd been dreading for as long as she could remember, and she was happier than she'd ever been. How amazing that this wonderful man wanted her above all others.
She finished speaking and put the ring on his finger, almost dropping it. He steadied her hand with his free one and smiled at her.
Porter bent Xena over in a deep kiss and then held her as they slow danced under the wedding arch until the sun went down.
"We're ignoring our guests," he said finally.
"We have guests?"
He chuckled, and kissed her. "I should say hello to my son, at least." He went to give the boy a hug.
Xena stood in her own backyard, a married w
oman, feeling dazed and happy. Her parents and siblings came to congratulate her but she couldn't remember a word they said.
Porter took her by the hand. "The limo's here," he said, and they ran for it, laughing, under a shower of rice.
Porter put the ring on Xena's finger, and then it was her turn to repeat the vows, her voice choked with emotion. This was the most important moment of her entire life, a moment she'd been dreading for as long as she could remember, and she was happier than she'd ever been. How amazing that this wonderful man wanted her above all others.She finished speaking and put the ring on his finger, almost dropping it. He steadied her hand with his free one and smiled at her.
Porter bent Xena over in a deep kiss and then held her as they slow danced under the wedding arch until the sun went down.
"We're ignoring our guests," he said finally.
"We have guests?"
He chuckled, and kissed her. "I should say hello to my son, at least." He went to give the boy a hug.
Xena stood in her own backyard, a married w
oman, feeling dazed and happy. Her parents and siblings came to congratulate her but she couldn't remember a word they said.Porter took her by the hand. "The limo's here," he said, and they ran for it, laughing, under a shower of rice.
Second Date
For their second date Xanthe wore a nice dress, since Walter was taking her to the Shangri-La. He whistled his approval when he saw her.
"Wow, Xanth. You clean up nice."
"Thanks." She twirled around.
She was nervous in the car, not sure what to say. Their first date had been really informal. They'd walked to the coffee shop down the street and spent the whole night talking. This date felt more like the real thing, and she had butterflies.
"Relax," he said, taking her hand for a moment, his other hand on the wheel. "It's just me."
"I know," she said. "I don't know why I'm so tense. I guess I'm just waiting to screw this up."
"You won't." He stopped the car and came around to open her door for her.
"You're always such a gentleman."
"My Momma would roll over in her grave if she thought I was anything else."
"I'm sorry. I didn't realize she had died."
"It's OK. It happened when George and I were in high school. We never met our father, so we kind of raised ourselves after that."
"Well, you did a good job."
Dinner was delicious, the patio was beautiful, and Xanthe began to relax, though a different sort of feeling was taking control of her. When Walter took her hand across the table she felt little currents of desire run all the way through her.
"Walter," she said, "I think I'm ready to go home now."
He looked into her eyes and smiled at what he saw there. "Check," he called.
It had been worth the wait. It was magic, it was heaven, it was better than anything she'd ever felt before and she wondered how adults ever got anything done.
She wanted to spend the rest of her life here in bed, with Walter's arms around her, alone in their own little universe.
She felt like she could fly.
"Wow, Xanth. You clean up nice."
"Thanks." She twirled around.
She was nervous in the car, not sure what to say. Their first date had been really informal. They'd walked to the coffee shop down the street and spent the whole night talking. This date felt more like the real thing, and she had butterflies.
"Relax," he said, taking her hand for a moment, his other hand on the wheel. "It's just me."
"I know," she said. "I don't know why I'm so tense. I guess I'm just waiting to screw this up."
"You won't." He stopped the car and came around to open her door for her.
"You're always such a gentleman."
"My Momma would roll over in her grave if she thought I was anything else."
"I'm sorry. I didn't realize she had died."
"It's OK. It happened when George and I were in high school. We never met our father, so we kind of raised ourselves after that."
"Well, you did a good job."
Dinner was delicious, the patio was beautiful, and Xanthe began to relax, though a different sort of feeling was taking control of her. When Walter took her hand across the table she felt little currents of desire run all the way through her.
"Walter," she said, "I think I'm ready to go home now."
He looked into her eyes and smiled at what he saw there. "Check," he called.
It had been worth the wait. It was magic, it was heaven, it was better than anything she'd ever felt before and she wondered how adults ever got anything done.
She wanted to spend the rest of her life here in bed, with Walter's arms around her, alone in their own little universe.
She felt like she could fly.
Wings
"So," George said over breakfast the next day, "You and Xanthe." The two brothers were alone.
"Yes."
"Aren't you worried that she's, you know, kind of flighty?"
"Says the guy with both feet firmly planted on Cloud Nine."
George rolled his eyes. "For you, little brother, not for me."
"God. You two together. That would be messy."
"But fun." George grinned.
Walter laughed. "You have no room to talk, George. And I'm not your little brother."
"Five minutes says differently."
"Whatever. So, how's Brandi?"
"Who? Oh, Brandi. Fine. I'm not sure she's the one for me, though ... "
"What, no crash and burn first?"
"Hey, a guy can mature."
"Uh huh. And next you'll be telling me you sprouted wings."
"Speaking of that, I gotta fly," George said. "Later, bro. I'm late for class." He sprinted out the door.
"Yes."
"Aren't you worried that she's, you know, kind of flighty?"
"Says the guy with both feet firmly planted on Cloud Nine."
George rolled his eyes. "For you, little brother, not for me."
"God. You two together. That would be messy."
"But fun." George grinned.
Walter laughed. "You have no room to talk, George. And I'm not your little brother."
"Five minutes says differently."
"Whatever. So, how's Brandi?"
"Who? Oh, Brandi. Fine. I'm not sure she's the one for me, though ... "
"What, no crash and burn first?"
"Hey, a guy can mature."
"Uh huh. And next you'll be telling me you sprouted wings."
"Speaking of that, I gotta fly," George said. "Later, bro. I'm late for class." He sprinted out the door.
Here We Go Again
Aries and Zaid were in the middle of a heated political debate, as usual, when Stella walked in. For a laid-back guy, Aries got pretty fired up whenever the discussion turned to his favorite subject.
"You can't change the system from within because the system is inherently corrupt," Zaid was saying. "Revolution is the only true answer."
"So, we just allow chaos to run rampant? What kind of system is that?"
"Anarchy is better than a plutocracy, which is what we've got now."
Stella sighed and dug out the garbage bags. "Uh, guys, someone knocked over our garbage cans. Again. Any idea who?"
"Ask Xanthe, she's the femme fatale," Zaid said, rising to his feet. "I'll help you clean it up."
"Thanks, Zaid."
"Any idea which ex boyfriend is responsible?" Aries said, following them out to the yard.
"Who can keep track?" Zaid rolled his eyes. "You'd think that girl was deliberately trying to cause trouble."
"She isn't?" Aries teased.
"Nah. She just can't make up her ... "
All three of them stopped and stared at Xanthe and Walter, kissing.
"Great," Zaid muttered. "Here we go again ... "
"You can't change the system from within because the system is inherently corrupt," Zaid was saying. "Revolution is the only true answer."
"So, we just allow chaos to run rampant? What kind of system is that?"
"Anarchy is better than a plutocracy, which is what we've got now."
Stella sighed and dug out the garbage bags. "Uh, guys, someone knocked over our garbage cans. Again. Any idea who?"
"Ask Xanthe, she's the femme fatale," Zaid said, rising to his feet. "I'll help you clean it up."
"Thanks, Zaid."
"Any idea which ex boyfriend is responsible?" Aries said, following them out to the yard.
"Who can keep track?" Zaid rolled his eyes. "You'd think that girl was deliberately trying to cause trouble."
"She isn't?" Aries teased.
"Nah. She just can't make up her ... "
All three of them stopped and stared at Xanthe and Walter, kissing.
"Great," Zaid muttered. "Here we go again ... "
Stuck On You
"I don't share," Walter said when they came up for air. "You going to keep seeing that Glen person?"
"Glen who?" Xanthe asked, in a daze.
Walter grinned at her. "So, you my girl now?"
"Uh, yeah, I guess I am."
"Good." He took her by the hand and kissed her again. "I know you're skittish about settling down, Xanthe, but I'm just starting my Sophomore year and you're a Senior. I don't want to get married until I graduate, so you've got three whole years to get used to the idea."
"M ... married?"
"Yes, you nutty person. Married. You don't think something like this comes along every lifetime, do you?"
"N ... nooo, I guess not."
"You do like me, right?"
"Oh, I think that's safe to say," she said, still dizzy from his kiss.
"Well, good. Because I'm crazy about you, Xanthe, and like it or not, you're stuck with me now. So you'd better get used to the idea."
Stuck with Walter. That sounded pretty good to her. She grinned at him goofily, still feeling like she was floating above the atmosphere.
"So," he said, "what are you doing tonight?"
"Glen who?" Xanthe asked, in a daze.
Walter grinned at her. "So, you my girl now?"
"Uh, yeah, I guess I am."
"Good." He took her by the hand and kissed her again. "I know you're skittish about settling down, Xanthe, but I'm just starting my Sophomore year and you're a Senior. I don't want to get married until I graduate, so you've got three whole years to get used to the idea."
"M ... married?"
"Yes, you nutty person. Married. You don't think something like this comes along every lifetime, do you?"
"N ... nooo, I guess not."
"You do like me, right?"
"Oh, I think that's safe to say," she said, still dizzy from his kiss.
"Well, good. Because I'm crazy about you, Xanthe, and like it or not, you're stuck with me now. So you'd better get used to the idea."
Stuck with Walter. That sounded pretty good to her. She grinned at him goofily, still feeling like she was floating above the atmosphere.
"So," he said, "what are you doing tonight?"
Xanthe Lands on the Moon
It was the beginning of Xanthe's senior year and the six roomies had formed solid friendships over the past term.
Aries was seeing a girl named Cheryl who matched him, same skin tone, same blonde hair, same laid-back attitude. George was currently in love with a girl named Brandi Knight who seemed nice enough. Zaid was still seeing DJ, and Walter, Stella and Xanthe, as the single roomies, had a lot of time to spend getting to know each other.
Xanthe was OK with being single, but she missed dating, so when Glen Perry called and asked her out she said yes.
Maybe this time I'll hit the moon, she thought. That's what had been missing with the other men she'd dated. They'd been nice enough, but when they kissed her she felt let down. She wanted to hit the moon, no matter how silly that seemed. No one in her family had settled for second best. They were all madly in love. Why shouldn't she have that too?
She was determined to wait until she did.
But when Glen kissed her she felt nothing. She hadn't expected to, really, the way the date was going, and she wished she could find a graceful way out of kissing him, but she was no good at that kind of thing, the finesse of letting a guy down easy, and then he was kissing her and acting all spoony about it.
It was nice enough, but no moon. He drove her home, hinting that he'd like to see her again, and she did her best to be politely noncomittal, but by the time he dropped her off he was fuming.
"You're just a tease, like Justin said."
"I am not!" She got out of the car in a huff and he sped off.
She wasn't. She wasn't a tease. She just wasn't ready to settle for the first hamhanded, lousy kisser that came along.
"Hi Walter," she said, seeing him walking back from class.
He ignored her and went inside.
"Walter? What's wrong?"
He stopped, and turned to face her. He looked angry.
"What is it?" she asked.
"You were on a date, weren't you."
"Yeah, with Glen, but ... "
He brushed her off and kept walking.
"Walter, what's the matter with you?"
He stopped again and dropped his backpack on the ground. "You know, for a smart girl, you're pretty stupid sometimes."
"I don't know what you mean."
"This is what I mean." He grabbed her and kissed her, pushing her back against the rough stucco wall, his hands in her hair. She slid her arms around his neck and kissed him back. She felt breathless and trembly, not herself. She never wanted him to stop kissing her.
Oh. So that's what the moon felt like.
Aries was seeing a girl named Cheryl who matched him, same skin tone, same blonde hair, same laid-back attitude. George was currently in love with a girl named Brandi Knight who seemed nice enough. Zaid was still seeing DJ, and Walter, Stella and Xanthe, as the single roomies, had a lot of time to spend getting to know each other.
Xanthe was OK with being single, but she missed dating, so when Glen Perry called and asked her out she said yes.
Maybe this time I'll hit the moon, she thought. That's what had been missing with the other men she'd dated. They'd been nice enough, but when they kissed her she felt let down. She wanted to hit the moon, no matter how silly that seemed. No one in her family had settled for second best. They were all madly in love. Why shouldn't she have that too?
She was determined to wait until she did.
But when Glen kissed her she felt nothing. She hadn't expected to, really, the way the date was going, and she wished she could find a graceful way out of kissing him, but she was no good at that kind of thing, the finesse of letting a guy down easy, and then he was kissing her and acting all spoony about it.
It was nice enough, but no moon. He drove her home, hinting that he'd like to see her again, and she did her best to be politely noncomittal, but by the time he dropped her off he was fuming.
"You're just a tease, like Justin said."
"I am not!" She got out of the car in a huff and he sped off.
She wasn't. She wasn't a tease. She just wasn't ready to settle for the first hamhanded, lousy kisser that came along.
"Hi Walter," she said, seeing him walking back from class.
He ignored her and went inside.
"Walter? What's wrong?"
He stopped, and turned to face her. He looked angry.
"What is it?" she asked.
"You were on a date, weren't you."
"Yeah, with Glen, but ... "
He brushed her off and kept walking.
"Walter, what's the matter with you?"
He stopped again and dropped his backpack on the ground. "You know, for a smart girl, you're pretty stupid sometimes."
"I don't know what you mean."
"This is what I mean." He grabbed her and kissed her, pushing her back against the rough stucco wall, his hands in her hair. She slid her arms around his neck and kissed him back. She felt breathless and trembly, not herself. She never wanted him to stop kissing her.
Oh. So that's what the moon felt like.
Sibling Rivalry
"Hey, Xanth," Walter said, sitting down next to her on the cool tile floor. "Homework again?"
"I'm probably studying too much," she said, "but I really want to get on the Dean's List."
"I just missed it this term."
"I know. Sorry about that."
He shrugged. "My own fault. I wasn't as dedicated as I should have been. You seem driven."
She shrugged. "It's a kind of friendly competition with my sibs. My sister Xena graduated with a solid 4.0. Not even Ariel, the family supergenius, did that."
"And you want to top that, huh. Kind of hard to do."
"Not top it, just not let her do better than me."
He grinned. "Sibling rivalry is a slippery path, my friend."
"You should know."
He chuckled. "Guilty as charged. We've been competing since George came out of the womb five minutes before I did."
"My siblings are so much older than me. They've got families already. I'd have liked to have a sibling closer to my own age."
"It's a mixed blessing." Walter stretched. "I'd better get to that homework if I'm going to beat you next term."
"I'll wipe the floor with you," she said, grinning.
"We'll just have to see about that, won't we," he said, getting up and leaving the room.
"I'm probably studying too much," she said, "but I really want to get on the Dean's List."
"I just missed it this term."
"I know. Sorry about that."
He shrugged. "My own fault. I wasn't as dedicated as I should have been. You seem driven."
She shrugged. "It's a kind of friendly competition with my sibs. My sister Xena graduated with a solid 4.0. Not even Ariel, the family supergenius, did that."
"And you want to top that, huh. Kind of hard to do."
"Not top it, just not let her do better than me."
He grinned. "Sibling rivalry is a slippery path, my friend."
"You should know."
He chuckled. "Guilty as charged. We've been competing since George came out of the womb five minutes before I did."
"My siblings are so much older than me. They've got families already. I'd have liked to have a sibling closer to my own age."
"It's a mixed blessing." Walter stretched. "I'd better get to that homework if I'm going to beat you next term."
"I'll wipe the floor with you," she said, grinning.
"We'll just have to see about that, won't we," he said, getting up and leaving the room.
Walter and George
George was a poet. He would often wander off mid-conversation to find a piece of paper, and then sit in the corner scribbling for an hour or so. Sometimes when he ran out of notebook paper he'd use other things.
"Hey, Shakespeare," Aries said, "lay off the toilet paper, OK? Or at least go buy some more."
"Sorry, bro," George said, blushing as much as a man his color could blush.
"Oh, leave him alone, Aries," Stella said. "His poetry is beautiful."
George looked even more embarrassed and went to get the car and go buy more toilet paper.
"He's in love, that's why he's writing again," Walter said, smiling after his brother. "Wait till he falls out of love, again. Then he'll just be all Byrony and broody."
"Happen a lot?" Zaid asked.
"More than you can imagine." Walter was a history major, and passionate about his subject. He and Xanthe stayed up all night one night arguing about communism and why it had collapsed in the Soviet Union. She found him interesting, if a little intimidating. She was out of her depth when it came to history. Give her a lab and a test tube any day.
"Hey, Shakespeare," Aries said, "lay off the toilet paper, OK? Or at least go buy some more."
"Sorry, bro," George said, blushing as much as a man his color could blush."Oh, leave him alone, Aries," Stella said. "His poetry is beautiful."
George looked even more embarrassed and went to get the car and go buy more toilet paper.
"He's in love, that's why he's writing again," Walter said, smiling after his brother. "Wait till he falls out of love, again. Then he'll just be all Byrony and broody."
"Happen a lot?" Zaid asked.
"More than you can imagine." Walter was a history major, and passionate about his subject. He and Xanthe stayed up all night one night arguing about communism and why it had collapsed in the Soviet Union. She found him interesting, if a little intimidating. She was out of her depth when it came to history. Give her a lab and a test tube any day.
Poison
As soon as Xena got home from work that night she lost it. She stood in the doorway, sobbing like a six year old girl. Porter ran to her and held her and sat her down on the couch, not saying a word until she'd gotten herself under control.
He handed her a tissue and she blew her nose, loudly.
"The show closed," she said, mouth trembling. "The critics hated it. They said I was ... AWFUL!" She started to cry again. "And it's not fair because the director is a big huge jerk who made me do the role that way ... I knew I shouldn't have taken this part."
Porter declared it a sick of work day the next day and made her lie on the couch while he brought her chicken soup. She wore her comfy jammies and watched soap operas with her head on some pillows and her feet in his lap. He read a book. He couldn't stand soap operas.
"I don't want to go back to work," Xena said. "My agent said he has a cartoon voice gig for me, but that's about it. I'm ... poison," she sniffled again.
"You're not poison. Show business is silly and fickle, you know that. This will all blow over, you'll see. We can't afford for you not to work, but if you want to get a different job, even if the pay is less, then go ahead."
"No," she said, "I'll face my fears and just go. You work at a job you hate because it pays well. Why should I get special treatment? Besides, you know what they say, get back on the horse and all that."
Porter smiled at her. "Let's go out to dinner somewhere special. I think it's time we got off this couch."
He handed her a tissue and she blew her nose, loudly.
"The show closed," she said, mouth trembling. "The critics hated it. They said I was ... AWFUL!" She started to cry again. "And it's not fair because the director is a big huge jerk who made me do the role that way ... I knew I shouldn't have taken this part."
Porter declared it a sick of work day the next day and made her lie on the couch while he brought her chicken soup. She wore her comfy jammies and watched soap operas with her head on some pillows and her feet in his lap. He read a book. He couldn't stand soap operas.
"I don't want to go back to work," Xena said. "My agent said he has a cartoon voice gig for me, but that's about it. I'm ... poison," she sniffled again.
"You're not poison. Show business is silly and fickle, you know that. This will all blow over, you'll see. We can't afford for you not to work, but if you want to get a different job, even if the pay is less, then go ahead."
"No," she said, "I'll face my fears and just go. You work at a job you hate because it pays well. Why should I get special treatment? Besides, you know what they say, get back on the horse and all that."
Porter smiled at her. "Let's go out to dinner somewhere special. I think it's time we got off this couch."
Four Becomes Six
The four roommates were getting awfully tired of hotdogs and gelatin. They had bought a grill rather than a stove when they first moved in, to save money. And now it was the start of a new term and they had weeks until they'd get their new stipends, and somehow they had managed to spend nearly every penny.
First, they'd needed new beds. The ones they were sleeping on left them tired and cranky, and Aries had a crick in his neck for a week that made him almost grouchy. Then, they'd needed a second shower.
And then the boys had come home wheeling a stove, grinning from ear to ear. Xanthe was worried about money but joined Stella in a little cheer.
Aries and Zaid took a bow. "No more hot dogs for us," Aries said.
Once the stove was installed it was clear they must have a "we just got a stove" party, which wiped out even more of their money, as they needed to order pizzas and buy a stereo.
The next morning when Xanthe got up to fix breakfast she discovered they'd gone through all of their groceries. She clipped coupons all day and managed to get them enough food for a week on what was left.
"We've got fifty simoleans left," Zaid said at dinner. "We need to get another roommate."
"How about your girlfriend?" Xanthe suggested.
"No go. I asked her already. She's president of her sorority, and besides she says moving in would be too serious a move, at this point in our relationship."
Xanthe could definitely identify with that. "So, what?"
"How about Walter and George?" Aries said. "I know them from highschool. They're cool guys, but they're brothers, so you get one, you get the other."
"Do we have room for two more?" Stella worried.
"We can move the weight machines into the courtyard," Zaid said. "It's not like someone's going to steal them."
Yes, they were broke, but everyone had wanted the machines, and Aries had found some at a bargain last year.
"All in favor of George and Walter, raise your hand," Zaid said. Everyone raised their hands.
And so four became six.
First, they'd needed new beds. The ones they were sleeping on left them tired and cranky, and Aries had a crick in his neck for a week that made him almost grouchy. Then, they'd needed a second shower.
And then the boys had come home wheeling a stove, grinning from ear to ear. Xanthe was worried about money but joined Stella in a little cheer.
Aries and Zaid took a bow. "No more hot dogs for us," Aries said.
Once the stove was installed it was clear they must have a "we just got a stove" party, which wiped out even more of their money, as they needed to order pizzas and buy a stereo.
The next morning when Xanthe got up to fix breakfast she discovered they'd gone through all of their groceries. She clipped coupons all day and managed to get them enough food for a week on what was left.
"We've got fifty simoleans left," Zaid said at dinner. "We need to get another roommate."
"How about your girlfriend?" Xanthe suggested.
"No go. I asked her already. She's president of her sorority, and besides she says moving in would be too serious a move, at this point in our relationship."
Xanthe could definitely identify with that. "So, what?"
"How about Walter and George?" Aries said. "I know them from highschool. They're cool guys, but they're brothers, so you get one, you get the other."
"Do we have room for two more?" Stella worried.
"We can move the weight machines into the courtyard," Zaid said. "It's not like someone's going to steal them."
Yes, they were broke, but everyone had wanted the machines, and Aries had found some at a bargain last year.
"All in favor of George and Walter, raise your hand," Zaid said. Everyone raised their hands.
And so four became six.
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
It Runs in the Family
The investigation wasn't going too well. For one thing, Xena had gotten cast in a new production and was working her tail off trying to learn her new role. They had been able to buy a car, and a few things for the house, and it was starting to look like a home.
Porter hated his job, but it paid too well for him to quit just now, at least until they got their finances under control. He wanted to be a scientist, maybe teach at the university.
"Just do it, Porte
r," Xena urged. "Life is short."
"I will," he promised. "Just as soon as we can afford some new light fixtures, and a better bed. My back is killing me."
"And then we'll need a dishwasher, and new wallpaper, and ... Porter, it will always be something."
"I'll think about it."
She sighed and rolled her eyes. "Which means no."
They did manage to have some fun, of course. They even drove to the Shangri-La one afternoon just to have woohoo in the public hot tub, because it felt so naughty to do so. They had a lot of fun before the maitre d kicked them out. They giggled all the way to the car.
So between their jobs and worrying about money and spending time with
each other and getting to know Mallory, they didn't have a lot of time, or inclination, to dwell on their enemies and what they might be plotting.
They had narrowed it down to three suspects, two if you asked Xena, and a possible unknown person who meant them harm.
"Jack just wouldn't," she said. "He was sorry he caused all that trouble. I think he's staying well out of our way."
Porter frowned. "I'm not sure I share your optimism. But OK, if it's not him, we have Tiffany and Solange. And the fire happened before I found out about Mallory, so I have a strong hunch I know who our main enemy is."
"She sounds so unpleasant."
"Trust me, she's worse in person. And since we know it's probably her, we just need to make sure we keep tabs on her somehow."
"My grandmother."
"Come again?"
"Lola's the vampire hunter. It's her job to keep an eye on the vampires. So, we'll just let her know that Solange is sneaky, and possibly vindictive."
"We sicc an old lady on a vampire?"
"Hey, my grandma may be old, but I'm glad she's not my enemy. She can be ruthless."
"Old age and treachery, huh."
"In spades."
He grinned. "Must run in the family."
"Hey, watch it, buddy." The conversation dissolved into a tickle fight.
Porter hated his job, but it paid too well for him to quit just now, at least until they got their finances under control. He wanted to be a scientist, maybe teach at the university.
"Just do it, Porte
r," Xena urged. "Life is short.""I will," he promised. "Just as soon as we can afford some new light fixtures, and a better bed. My back is killing me."
"And then we'll need a dishwasher, and new wallpaper, and ... Porter, it will always be something."
"I'll think about it."
She sighed and rolled her eyes. "Which means no."
They did manage to have some fun, of course. They even drove to the Shangri-La one afternoon just to have woohoo in the public hot tub, because it felt so naughty to do so. They had a lot of fun before the maitre d kicked them out. They giggled all the way to the car.
So between their jobs and worrying about money and spending time with
each other and getting to know Mallory, they didn't have a lot of time, or inclination, to dwell on their enemies and what they might be plotting.They had narrowed it down to three suspects, two if you asked Xena, and a possible unknown person who meant them harm.
"Jack just wouldn't," she said. "He was sorry he caused all that trouble. I think he's staying well out of our way."
Porter frowned. "I'm not sure I share your optimism. But OK, if it's not him, we have Tiffany and Solange. And the fire happened before I found out about Mallory, so I have a strong hunch I know who our main enemy is."
"She sounds so unpleasant."
"Trust me, she's worse in person. And since we know it's probably her, we just need to make sure we keep tabs on her somehow."
"My grandmother."
"Come again?"
"Lola's the vampire hunter. It's her job to keep an eye on the vampires. So, we'll just let her know that Solange is sneaky, and possibly vindictive."
"We sicc an old lady on a vampire?"
"Hey, my grandma may be old, but I'm glad she's not my enemy. She can be ruthless."
"Old age and treachery, huh."
"In spades."
He grinned. "Must run in the family."
"Hey, watch it, buddy." The conversation dissolved into a tickle fight.
Xanthe and Xander
"Hi Xander," Xanthe sniffled into the phone.
"What's wrong, Xanthe?"
"Oh, nothing. I just broke up with David."
"Was he mean to you?" A protective tone crept into Xander's voice.
"Oh, nothing like that. He was wonderful. It was just getting so serious. I'm not ready for serious."
"Well, that's too bad, Xanthe, but I think it was probably for the best. He is a lot older than you."
"I know. I'm just worried I'm going to end up as a crazy cat lady," Xanthe said.
Xander laughed. "Xanthe, you're a junior in college. You have your whole life ahead of you. Trust me when I say there's no danger of cat ladyness."
"Promise?"
"Promise."
"Hey, what did I hear about you on the starting lineup for the team?" she said. "I didn't even know you were ON the team."
"Oh, yeah. Apollo told me there were tryouts and I made the cut. We tried to get Alec to try out too but his kids are younger than mine and he needs to be home with them."
"That's great, but I feel so out of touch. I heard it from my friend Zaid."
"So what's up with Zaid? He seems nice."
"He has a girlfriend, and I think he's cute and all, but honestly he's like another brother."
"Well, don't worry, Xanthe. The right guy's out there. Just don't think about it too much and he'll show up eventually."
"You're probably right," she said. "I'm not sure I'm ready for him right now, anyway."
"Well, good, then, that works out, doesn't it."
She laughed. "Yeah. I guess it does."
"What's wrong, Xanthe?"
"Oh, nothing. I just broke up with David."
"Was he mean to you?" A protective tone crept into Xander's voice.
"Oh, nothing like that. He was wonderful. It was just getting so serious. I'm not ready for serious."
"Well, that's too bad, Xanthe, but I think it was probably for the best. He is a lot older than you."
"I know. I'm just worried I'm going to end up as a crazy cat lady," Xanthe said.
Xander laughed. "Xanthe, you're a junior in college. You have your whole life ahead of you. Trust me when I say there's no danger of cat ladyness."
"Promise?"
"Promise."
"Hey, what did I hear about you on the starting lineup for the team?" she said. "I didn't even know you were ON the team."
"Oh, yeah. Apollo told me there were tryouts and I made the cut. We tried to get Alec to try out too but his kids are younger than mine and he needs to be home with them."
"That's great, but I feel so out of touch. I heard it from my friend Zaid."
"So what's up with Zaid? He seems nice."
"He has a girlfriend, and I think he's cute and all, but honestly he's like another brother."
"Well, don't worry, Xanthe. The right guy's out there. Just don't think about it too much and he'll show up eventually."
"You're probably right," she said. "I'm not sure I'm ready for him right now, anyway."
"Well, good, then, that works out, doesn't it."
She laughed. "Yeah. I guess it does."
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)